Well, I'd agree it's far from the best hole on the golf course, and you're right, it doesn't work really well whatever you call it. I just did enjoy watching pro after pro in the USOpen try to reach that green in two, and fail... Given there really is nothing to stop them from trying other than it's a long shot - that is, there is no hazard or anything they need to avoid, no real reason to lay back to 100 - absent the addition of a bunker like you say, it works better played at the 460 tee, so those with enough distance not only will always try to go in two, since you then call it a par 4, they EXPECT to reach it in two... The mind-game is just better from that tee... At the 500 tee, it's just bash-bash-chip, with no pressure, no thought....
Given the absence of any real strategic choices to be made, to me it just works better to ratchet up the intensity a bit by playing it at 460 and calling it a par 4. I'd guess that many people might score worse from this tee than from 500, even though they gain 40 yards, just due to the mind game...
TH