Tiger on Bethpage

[Kevin_Reilly]

I think this is from TigerWoods.com:


By Tiger Woods

I'm working hard on my game for the U.S. Open. Last week, Mark O'Meara and I played a quick practice round at Bethpage and I have to say it's the hardest par-70 course I've ever seen. Anyone who thinks the winning score will be in double-digits is crazy.

On a couple holes, you have to carry the ball 270 yards just to reach the fairway. Plus, the fairways are pretty narrow and the rough is about three inches. It's going to be a helluva test.

It's a fair course .#.#. depending how they set up the greens. With the rough the way it is, if they use front pins, it's going to be tough to get the ball close to the hole. I had a difficult time getting to the green from the rough.

Even though the greens are pretty flat, they're still tough to read. First, it looks like it breaks one way, then when you walk on the other side of the hole, it looks like it breaks another. If they USGA gets them 13 on the Stimpmeter, which I'm sure they're planning to do, it's going to be very interesting.

I go into the tournament with the same game plan every year: Hit fairways and greens. If you can do that, at least you give yourself a chance. If you don't, sooner or later it will catch up with you. If we don't get any wind, I think you'll have to shoot under par to win.

Given how long the course is, I can't see hitting many irons off the tee. I managed to reach both par-5's in two with irons, but hit good drives. I feel really good about the way I'm swinging my driver and expect to use it a lot.

One of the hardest things about practicing in Florida is the heat. The pores on your hands open up, your skin softens and they get torn up. I ice them down after almost every practice session.

My game feels pretty solid. I played well at the Deutsche Bank -- SAP Open in Germany and managed to beat Colin Montgomerie in a playoff, but wasn't sharp enough at the Memorial Tournament. That was obvious the first day when I made a bad mental mistake at the par-4 18th hole.

After a good drive, I was stuck between a 6 and 7 iron. Instead of hitting a three-quarter six, I tried to hit a full seven and buried it in the front bunker. Then, I made it worse by three-putting and finished with a double-bogey. Needless to say, I was hot.

What really made me mad was that I didn't listen to my instincts. I knew the correct shot was the three-quarter six, but I didn't trust myself. I played well on the weekend, but by then it was too late.

I must say Colin Montgomerie played very well the last day in Germany. I know his back was hurting, but he didn't make many mistakes and played very solid. I really like Monty. Sometimes he gets distracted and doesn't let things roll off his back, but he's a good guy and fun to be around.

I'm going to spend the next week practicing and resting. As I've said before, major championships take a lot out of you . To play your best, you must be prepared and rested.

As for winning the Grand Slam, I know the media will focus on it early in the week and that's okay. The truth is, I'm the only one who can because I won the Masters. Is it realistic? Anything is possible. All I can say is I've won four-in-a-row before.

Talk to you next month.

[Justin_Zook]

Tiger is the man.  What a great head he has on his shoulders.  Respecting the golf course is the first step, and formulating a strategy to play the course, is the next step.  He'll probably win this too.  Good Luck Tiger!

[Bruceski]

If Tiger hits the fairways he wins this one. Makes his practice sessions pretty straightforward.

Of course, if John Daly hits the fairways he wins, too.  

[JakaB]

The guy writes like he's twelve...better not quit his day job.

[Bruceski]

My guess is no way Tiger writes anything. He dictates to a lackey. Takes him all of 3 minutes.

[TEPaul]

Sounds to me like they may have reverse Tiger proofed a few of those long par 4s. If the fairways on a few of those holes really do start at 270 that will probably be a setup item that will be criticized under certain conditions probably forcing them to move the tees up. If any of the tour pros hit a decent drive and can't even get to the beginning of a fairway that would be a bit dumb.

[redanman]

Reads like a big spin job to me.  HE is licking his chops to shoot 15 under par.

Tiger's writer writes like he's twelve.  

zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

(14 Shinnecock is a great natural hole).

[Bruceski]

Wouldn't that be fun? Pros not reaching the fairway...hehehehe  

Maybe John Daly will lose his cool again and walk off the course cursing the USGA? Just adds to the drama...

[johnk]

Bruceski,

On Daly, I followed him on the front nine that day when he walked off at  Congressional.  He was playing pretty well.  I really don't think he left for golf reasons.  On #4, I believe, he unleashed driver through the cross walk, at least 340.  A pretty narrow chute to rip it that hard through.

The man looked gaunt, bloody red and worn out.  He weighed maybe 100lbs less than he does now, and his face was dark red.  Something was legimately wrong with his health.  

Of course he did curse the USGA at Pinehurst,
but I don't think he left the course...

johnk

[Kevin_Reilly]

Note that Tiger's ghostwriter was (or is) Mark Soltau, formerly the golf writer at the San Francisco Examiner.  Frequently appears on the Golf Channel.  

Member at Olympic, and judging by the comments above maybe someone (not me though) can say he's a better golfer than writer ...he's close to a scratch player.

[JakaB]

If Mark Soltau is truly the Ghost Writer somebody should call sqEarl cause Mr. Soltau is obviously "writing down" giving the impression Tiger is not an educated person.   I would never accuse this type of activity racism...but come on....how will Tiger rule the world of politics and finance if this is the best he got.

[huh]

Jakab,

Can you hit a golfball the way he did when he was twelve. If you can, quit your day job.

[BV]

Note that Tiger's ghostwriter was (or is) Mark Soltau, formerly the golf writer at the San Francisco Examiner.  

Knowing that fully explains it.  I should have recognized the style that I read for 5 years.  Nearly unreadable, but to be read  because that was it for the SF paper on local golf.  What was his daa-daa,  a hockey player?  I forget.

Also:
Proud author of the Golf Journal cover piece "The Best Coast" (About the left coast), my favorite piece in the history of the USGA magazine.

sheeeeeeeesh

Nice choice, Eldrick.  At least 6,895,652 people on this site can write equally as well or better.    (The one who doesn't qualify is me.)

[Dan Kelly]

That report would get the Highest Score Ever Recorded on the Flesch Readability Test -- which, I'm sure, is the whole idea: Keep It Simple, Stupid!

Without naming any names: Plenty of our political leaders aim just as low.

Just for fun, I translated the text into Redneck, at http://rinkworks.com/dialect/:

ah's wawkin' hard on mah game fo' th' U.S. Open, as enny fool kin plainly see. Last week, Mark O'Mearee an' ah played a quick prackice roun' at Bethpage an' ah have t'say it's th' hardess par-70 course I've evah see. Ennyone who reckons th' winnin' sco'e will be in double-digits is crazy. On a couple holes, yo' hafta carry th' ball 270 yards jest t'retch th' fairway. Plus, th' fairways is purdy narrow an' th' rough is about three inches. It's a-gonna be a helluva test. It's a fair course .#.#. dependin' how they set up th' greens. Wif th' rough th' way it is, eff'n they use front pins, it's a-gonna be tough t'git th' ball close t'th' hole. ah had a difficult time gittin' t'th' green fum th' rough. Even though th' greens is purdy flat, they're still tough t'read, cuss it all t' tarnation. Fust, it looks like it busts one way, then when yo' walk on t'other side of th' hole, it looks like it busts t'other. Eff'n they USGA gits them 13 on th' Stimpmeter, which ah's sho'nuff they're plannin' t'do, it's a-gonna be mighty interestin'. ah go into th' tournament wif th' same game plan ev'ry year: Hit fairways an' greens. Eff'n yo' kin does thet, at least yo' give yo'seff a chance. Eff'n yo' doesn't, sooner o' later it will ketch up wif yo'. Eff'n we doesn't git enny wind, ah reckon yo'll hafta shoot unner par t'win, as enny fool kin plainly see. Given how long th' course is, ah cain't see hittin' menny irons off th' tee. ah managed t'retch both par-5's in two wif irons, but hit fine drives. ah feel pow'ful fine about th' way ah's swin'in' mah drivah an' speck t'use it a lot. One of th' hardess thin's about prackicin' in Flo'ida is th' heat. Th' po'es on yer han's open up, yer hide soffens an' they git to'n up. ah ice them down af'er almost ev'ry prackice sesshun. Mah game feels purdy solid, cuss it all t' tarnation. ah played fine at th' Deutsche Bank -- SAP Open in Germenny an' managed t'beat Colin Montgomerie in a playoff, but warn't sharp inough at th' Memo'ial Tournament. Thet was obvious th' fust day when ah made a bad mental mistake at th' par-4 18th hole. Af'er a fine drive, ah was stuck between a 6 an' 7 iron, as enny fool kin plainly see. Instead of hittin' a three-quarter six, ah tried t'hit a full seven an' buried it in th' front bunker. Then, ah made it wo'se by three-puttin' an' finished wif a double-bogey. Needless t'say, ah was hot. Whut in tarnation pow'ful made me mad as a weasel in a blender was thet ah didn't lissen t'mah instincks. ah knowed th' co'reck shot was th' three-quarter six, but ah didn't trest mahse'f. ah played fine on th' weekend, but by then it was too late. ah muss say Colin Montgomerie played mighty fine th' last day in Germenny. ah knows his back was hurtin', but he didn't make menny mistakes an' played mighty solid, cuss it all t' tarnation. ah pow'ful like Monty. Sometimes he gits distracked an' don't let thin's roll off his back, but he's a fine guy an' fun t'be aroun'. ah's a-gonna spend th' next week prackicin' an' restin'. As I've said befo'e, majo' championships take a lot outta yo' . To play yer best, yo' muss be prepared an' rested, cuss it all t' tarnation. As fo' winnin' th' Gran' Slam, ah knows th' media will focus on it early in th' week an' thass okay. Th' truth is, ah's th' only one who kin on account o' ah won th' Masters. Is it realistic? Ennythin' is postible. All ah can say is I've won four-in-a-row befo'e. Talk t'yo' next month."

 

[Rick Shefchik]

That one appears to have been ghost-written by Sam Snead just before he died.

[Kevin_Reilly]

What was his daa-daa,  a hockey player?  I forget.

Gordie Soltau of the 49ers.

[Dan Kelly]

And in Cockney:

I'm bloody well workin' 'ard on me game for the bloomin' U.S. I'll get out me spoons. Open. Last week, right, Mark O'Meara and I played a quick practice round at Beffpage and I 'ave ter say it's the bloomin' hardest par-70 course I've ever seen. Any bloke 'oo finks the winnin' score will be in double-digits is crazy, do wot guvnor! On a couple 'oles, yer 'ave ter carry the ball 270 yards just ter reach the bloomin' fairway. Plus, right, the bleedin' fairways are pretty narrow and the rough is about free inches. It's gonna be an 'elluva test. It's a fair course .#.#, right? dependin' 'ow they set up the greens. Wiv the rough the bloomin' way it is, right, if they use front pins, it's gonna be tough ter get the ball close ter the hole, init?I 'ad a difficult time copping ter the bleedin' green from the rough. Even fough the greens are pretty flat, right, they're still tough ter read. First, it 'ave a looks like it breaks one way, ffen wen yer ball of chalk on the bloomin' uvver side of the chuffin' hole, it 'ave a looks like it breaks anuvver. If they USGA gets them 13 on the Stimpmeter, wich I'm bloody well sure they're plannin' ter do, right, it's gonna be right interestin'. I go into the bleedin' tournament wiv the bloomin' same game plan evry year: 'it fairways and greens. If yer can do that, at least yer give yorself a chance, init?If yer don't, sooner or later it will cotch up wiv yer. If we don't cop any wind, I fink yer'll 'ave ter shoot under par ter win. Given 'ow long the course is, right, I can't spot hittin' many irons off the bloomin' tee. I managed ter reach boff par-5's in two wiv irons, right, but 'it good drives. Cor blimey guv, would I lie to you? I feel right good about the chuffin' way I'm bloody well swinging me driver and expect ter use it a bit. One of the hardest fings about practicin' in Florida is the heat. The pores on yor 'ands open up, yor skin softens and they cop torn up. I ice them dahn after almost evry practice session. Me game feels pretty solid. I played well at the bloomin' Deutsche Bank -- SAP Open in Germany and managed ter beat Colin Montgomerie in a playoff, right, but weren't sharp enough at the Memorial Tournament. That were obvious the first day wen I made a bad mental mistake at the chuffin' par-4 18ff 'ole. After a good drive, I were stuck between a 6 and 7 iron. Instead of 'ittin' a free-quarter six, right, I tried ter hit a full seven and buried it in the front bunker. Then, I made it worse by free-puttin' and finished wiv a double-bogey. Needless ter say, right, I were 'ot. Wot right made me mad were that I didn't listen ter my instincts. I knew the bloody correct shot were the bloody ffree-quarter six, right, but I didn't trust meself. I played well on the weekend, right, but by then it were too late. I'll get out me spoons. I must say Colin Montgomerie played right well the bleedin' last day in Germany. I know 'is hammer and tack was 'urtin', but 'e didn't make many mistakes and played right solid. Right. I right like Monty. Sometimes 'e gets distracted and don't let fings roll off 'is back, but 'e's a good lad and fun ter be 'round. I'm bloody well gonna spend the bloody next week practicin' and restin'. As I've said before, major championships take a bit out of yer . To play yor best, yer must be prepared and rested. As for winnin' the Grand Slam, right, I know the media will focus on it early in the week and that's okay. Cor blimey guv, would I lie to you? The truff is, right, I'm bloody well the only one 'oo can because I won the Masters. Is it realistic, eh, guv? Anyfink is possible. Right. All I can say is I've won four-in-a-row before. Rabbit and pork ter yer next monff.

[Tom_Egan]

To Barney and others who scorn Tiger's writing skills:

Maybe it's just my stupid midwestern mentality, but I believe I understood everything Tiger was attempting to convey.  And I felt he made a couple of pretty good, thoughtful points.

Why should we expect a professional golfer (or one writing in behalf of a professional golfer) to write like anyone other than a professional golfer?  Do you really expect Tiger to describe his observations and opinions in the style of a Peggy Noonan, a William Buckley or an Ayn Rand?  GET REAL!!!  What REAL point is behind criticism of Tiger's writing style?

I've read a few -- a very few -- examples of writing excellence on this site.  I treasure them when I see them but they are certainly unexpected.  What I mostly read are articulate, thoughtful and gramatically correct comments by knowledgeable and caring golfers.  That's all I expect of the rest of you.  I see no reason whatever to hold Tiger to a higher standard.  Why do you?