Yesterday, I had the distinct honor of being an observer at the match of the 21st century. Yes, I was in the group at the Kings Putter V that contained a match between Golf's Most Beloved Figure and The Emperor. First, let me say that the Emperor was playing his third round of golf in just over 24 hours and was very well wamed up. Golf's MBF was fresh off a plane with only a small warmup on the range at Stone Eagle.
Little will be said of the quality of the golf in this report as it goes without saying that these two major figures in World Golf could not be expected to play at anything other than their true ability. (That and the fact that they threatened to ban me from the group for life if I mentioned certain details.)
The Emperor used his advantage in pre-match preparation to jump out to a quick 3-up lead after 3-holes. By this time Golf's MBF was ready to rumble. He stormed back winning holes 4 5 and 6 to square the match. The Emperor then brought out the big guns. As he attempted to drive up to the elevated 7th tee in his cart, he somehow broke it and sat in the 6th fairway for a good 5 minutes while Golf's MBF fumed at the tee. Finally the Big-E "got it working" and drove to the tee. Golf's MBF was so put out that he "barely" missed the green. The Emperor then stuffed his tee shot and won the hole with a birdie to get back on top. Golf's MBF made short work of the par-5 8th and had it won almost before he was required to hit a tee ball, squaring the match again. From there, the 9th hole was halved with something leaving the match all square at the turn.
On 10, both players played up the right side to keep an eye on each other and Golf's MBF eventually won the hole to take his first lead in the match. As at #8, he made quick work of 11 and he jumped to a two-up lead. Both players parred the par 3 12th. On 13, The Emperor began his comeback with another fairly simple victory. He played the hole so well that it was obvious even before he left the tee that he would probably win it.
The difficult 14th found The Emperor in a tough spot standing in the green side bunker while his ball lay on the grass well above his feet. Golf's MBF took a picture of the incident and if he didn't delete it, might be coerced into posting it. The Emperor hit a magnificent shot from there and saved a half. 15 found him making another great recovery getting up and down from the right side bunker and grinding out the resulting 4-foot putt. On 16, he finally found his opening as Golf's MBF made a tactical mistake of trying to play the hole down the 17th fairway (or did it get all the way to 18, I can't remember.) The Emperor played the hole differently, almost paying a visit to the facilities on the right as he tacked away from the MBF. He then sunk another clutch putt and we went to 17 all square. As I recall, 17 and 18 were halved with routine something or others.
So, on to the tricky 19th hole we went. There The Emperor putt the ball off the front left of the green while Golf's Most Beloved was long right (I think). The Emperor hit a wonderful shot and eventually eked out a win by one stroke on that hole to take the match for the hated Southern Californians.
In retrospect, I would say that Golf's Most Beloved Figure showed why he has earned that sobriquet by conceding a few putts that lesser men might have required their opponents to putt. The Emperor tempered his victory by running the golf cart into the head of his teammate, David Kelly, on the 18th tee and allowing this reporter the chance to eke out a victory of his own in an equally well played match which came down to superior putting prowess on this reporter's behalf (IMHO).
The preceding report should be taken with one of the largest grains of salt you've ever seen (especially the part about my putting.)
If this is my last post ever, you'll probably be able to figure out why.