I think the whole key is knowing what to do in certain situations. I mean, if you are going to play Merion, CPC, Monterey, or wherever, ask the person who is hosting you what the standards are for the club. Personally, I am fairly ok when it comes to dress, I wear pants almost everywhere I play especially if I called the pro at the club to arrange the time. But many people, especially in summer may not wear pants. That would be pretty embarassing for the host if his guest showed up in shorts. Same goes if you intend to have lunch. Some upscale clubs require you to wear a sport jacket (and in some cases a tie) to eat in the dining room or use clubhouse facilities. Same goes, it would be rather embarassing for the host if you or I were to show up ready to eat lunch without a jacket and tie if that was required.
Just communicate with the person who is hosting you at his or her club. Ask what the dress code is. Ask about money arrangements (assuming the host doesn't cover everything, many private clubs don't take cash; I learned that one in an interesting way) Ask about their tipping policy. I can go on. But if we just communicate with our hosts, none of this 'bow at the feet' stuff has to happen. Now yeah, if we roll up wearing shorts, a mock neck shirt and talking on the cell phone at PV or CPC, etc. then yeah, we might have to 'bow' a bit since the host is going to have to clean up this garbage for the next 10 years. But as long as everyone knows what is expected, everything should be cool.