[Dan Kelly]

Gentlemen,

More years ago than I care to remember, I had a classics master teaching Greek, who when confronted with school boy passions and personal feuds reminded us of the word "irenic."  You can look it up,  it was all about reconciliation. I do wish that we could do that here.

At least let us try.

Bob

I looked it up at m-w.com:

irenic \ī-ˈre-nik, -ˈrē-\

Function: adjective

Etymology: Greek eirēnikos, from eirēnē peace

Date: circa 1864

: favoring, conducive to, or operating toward peace, moderation, or conciliation

---------------

Note the date.

A bloody civil war was in progress in America when the word was coined.

Reconciliation (more or less, eventually) followed.

Perhaps that can happen here, as well.

I suggest the following tactic (or is it a strategy? emoticon omitted) to all of the combatants:

Let the other guy have the last word -- even if the other guy's last word is ignorant and offensive.

Dan

[Dan Herrmann]

JC - do what I do - drive very slowly down Golf House road, look for an opening, and sneak on!

[tlavin]

I did not realize until today that The Great Merion Championship BOUT is so large it actually has an UNDERCARD bout going on. Do we need some really good championship referees on here or some really good professional sociologists, or perhaps both? 

I saw that wingnut Dr Katz on here a day or so ago but he ain't worth his weight in salt to resolve anything.

Funny stuff.

All that's needed is a 19th Hole somewhere, with a few mediator types, and a bartender who will put the Ketel to the metal.  Then the fur can fly and the dispute can be aired face-to-face and it should dissipate.

I know somebody who knows somebody who knows both Dr. Phil and Jerry Springer.  If we throw in Maury and his lie detector, I think I can settle this here dispute!

[JC Jones]

JC - do what I do - drive very slowly down Golf House road, look for an opening, and sneak on!

Good call.  I'll keep that in mind next time Im in Philly.

[mike_malone]

 My mother has a simple question she asks---"Does it make you happy?".I assume leaving the site makes Wayne happy. That's why I say he has gotten smarter.

[TEPaul]

Come on Dan, that's nowhere near as effective as letting my little diarrehic dog (that Mucci has named Coorshaw) loose on the course.

I just go walk around any golf course no matter how private with my putter and a couple balls in hand. If anyone tries to stop me I just tell them: "You've got a choice, you can let me walk the course and find him or you can throw me off in which case he will probably deposit some really slimmy, smelly shit on each one of your greens and generally in or around the cups, so what'll it be?"

This is how I've been testing some of the greatest greens in the world for years.

[Dan Herrmann]

priceless, Tom, priceless

[TEPaul]

"I know somebody who knows somebody who knows both Dr. Phil and Jerry Springer.  If we throw in Maury and his lie detector, I think I can settle this here dispute!"

Terry:

Have your people contact my people and Wayne's people and Moriarty's people and MacWood's people and Springer and Dr Phil's people. I might get somebody's people to contact Geraldo's people.

I'd like to do a sitdown in the grillroom at Merion. But I'm gonna be bringing some pretty large "heavies" with me like Gil Hanse (6'6") and Mike Young (6' 3 13/16") and before we get into the sauce and settle this thing I do want a chance to have a chair-slinging free-for-all where hopefully I can punch out Moriarty and MacWood before they punch out me and the Pissboy.

[Kalen Braley]

Hey Tom,

I'm 6'2" and heavy in general, can I come too?

I haven't been in a good haymaker throwing, eye-gouging, sucker-punch throwing, knock em down, drag em out melee in quite some time.  (Once your an adult, they tend to frown on that kinda stuff). I don't care who's side I'm on, it'd just be great to kick it old school and mix it up again!!   Cause  what happens at Merion, stays at Merion right?

OH and btw, can you please send a message to Wayne to invite me out a day early so i can play the course first?  Kinda hard to play with sore knuckles and one eye half swollen shut.

P.S. Still looking up defintion for "irnoic"  

[Tom Huckaby]

Those who know David Moriarty must be chuckling at this as well.

Let's just say David is not a small man.

You're best off keeping this to a war of words, Tom.

 

[TEPaul]

"Hey Tom,
I'm 6'2" and heavy in general, can I come too?"


You can indeed, Kalen, but if you're not on my side throughout you better get your affairs in order before you go into Merion's grillroom.

[Matt OBrien]

Can I go and tape it for all the others to see?

[Kalen Braley]

Tom,

"I'm reawwlly scawwwed"  in my best Elmder Fudd voice.  I've been thru some bad neighboorhoods, been in some sketchy spots, even drove thru Oakland late one night, but thats all nothing. The Merions grillroom has really got me shaking in my boots!! 

As for whose side I'm on ... via a JK "projection", I'll be on whosever side gets me there a day early for a round of golf!! 

[TEPaul]

"You're best off keeping this to a war of words, Tom."

Ahh, bullshit, Huck. It's not me, it's my crew. Hell, I used to hang with a bunch of maniacs in the Marines and all I was ever assigned to do in baroom brawls and such is to go lock the door before all hell broke loose. For the longest time I couldn't figure out what the point of that was so finally I asked one of my Boys. He said; "It's so none of their friends can get in, you dipshit!"

True stuff here. I never saw them lose and they definitely had their technique down which was, first, let the other side do the talking and never say a word, second, always start the fight without a word (never let the other side start it), and third, I almost never saw those guys use their hands it was all with their feet. The other amazing thing is it never took more than about fifteen seconds.

[Tom Huckaby]

Gents, I have zero doubt it would be a battle royal.

Just wanted you to know about at least one of your opponents, that's all.

 

[TEPaul]

As for whose side I'm on ... via a JK "projection", I'll be on whosever side gets me there a day early for a round of golf!!   "


Well, fine Kalen. Do you think I'm some kind of idiot?? I don't see Moriarty or MacWood's side getting you any tees times---not early, not middle of the day, and not late. Basically not anything. The best those guys could do for you is maybe slip you a free cracker!



"I can swing a 1 iron in excess of 110 mph, and a head is much easier to hit than a Titleist.
Can I come, too?"



You can come too Shivas but not unless you can paint a "cheater line" on MacWood and Moriarty's forehead first. 

[David Stamm]

I'll send these 2 (see below) to referee. They are my 2 younger brothers.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DA3cDUo2Tf8

[Dan Kelly]

Gents, I have zero doubt it would be a battle royal.

History will be written by the victors (if any).

[TEPaul]

"Just wanted you to know about at least one of your opponents, that's all."

Who's that Huckaby? Are you talking about Moriarty? I've met him and he didn't look like much to me except he seems to be one of those "modern" Californians who must live in some area out there where they don't have many razors.    

[Peter Pallotta]

I have a puckish sense of humour and a charming vunerability that tends to disarm my opponents...I'd like to come too.

Peter 

[Kalen Braley]

Huck,

Unless Moriaty is either Chuck Norris and Bruce Lee all wrapped up in one or packing heat, I doubt he'll have much chance against all us heavies that Tom Paul will be lining up.

I'll just give him a quick kick to the nads and then sit on him and its game over!! 

[Dan Kelly]

I have a puckish sense of humour and a charming vunerability that tends to disarm my opponents...I'd like to come too.

Peter 

Peter Pallotta, channeling David Sedaris.

[TEPaul]

"I have a puckish sense of humour and a charming vunerability that tends to disarm my opponents...I'd like to come too."


PeterP:

Damn you to hell----that is one of those remarks that's going to get me to wake up in the middle of the night and start laughing all over again---I know it is.

[Peter Wagner]

I'm just skimming and laughing but I must have missed an important post or two because I don't know who the reference 'Pissboy' refers to.

For the sake of those not in the melee... who be Pissboy? 

- Peter

[Dan Kelly]

I'm just skimming and laughing but I must have missed an important post or two because I don't know who the reference 'Pissboy' refers to.

For the sake of those not in the melee... who be Pissboy? 

- Peter

Could be any of 'em -- right?

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