From my own, decidedly male ( ) point of view: I've never looked down on a woman for her playing from the forward tees. Why would I? Nor have I ever heard any of my decidedly male (so far as I know! ) playing companions expressing any disregard of any woman for her playing from the forward tees.
Perhaps this "stigma" is a figment of club women's imagination?
I'm not so sure, Dan.
First off, I think there will always be a level of stigma that goes with the forward tees, simply because they're associated with a lower level of golfing skill. Golfers tend to accord more respect to playing a longer course. I know I get a lot more respect from men when I play back. So it makes sense to me that if the forward tees are shortened even more, it will mean less respect for the golfers that play from them.
Aside from that, I think men stigmatize other men when the forward tees come into play. I've played with enough men to know that if one of them doesn't hit his drive beyond the forward tees, he's teased that he has to drop his pants to "prove his manhood".
Here's a story to consider. This fellow named Michael and I schedule a round at a nice course. It has four sets of teeboxes, and after looking at the scorecard I say I'd like to play from the 2nd set of tees, around 6000 yards. He's amenable, and we place a wager of lunch on the round. Well, we get teamed up with a couple of young guns who are playing from the 3rd set of tees. Michael decides to move back to where these young bucks are playing from, and says it's because his manhood is at stake! (At least he was gracious enough not to ask for any strokes for handicapping himself in such a manner, and I easily trounced him before he finally gave up on the 16th.)
Anyways, there's more going on here than just *the shame* of being a lousy golfer. Men are stigmatizing each other and even themselves just for playing from (or simply *being* in) an area of the golf course that they associate with women in particular, not just mediocre golf skill. While women might not be stigmatized for playing from the forward tees per se, I do think it trickles down into the respect or lack thereof we get from the men, some of which isn't for our lack of golfing expertise but simply because we are women. Thanfully, I sense this trend on the wane, as sexism in our country continues to diminish and as more males play from the forward tees.
By the way, the stigmatizing does go the other way. I've been chastized by other women for playing further back, usually along the lines of something like, "What, you think you're too good to play up here with us?" So we're not exactly angels ourselves.