Coming to Melbourne? Here's What You Need to Know

[Sean_A]

So you are cruising down the motorway at 4kmp over the limit and a ticket is looming?  Are the speed guns that accurate?

RJ - you can have 10% blood alcohol in Wisconsin and still be legal?  That seems high to me.  My mate was pulled over in Hungary and failed the breathalizer by drinking cough medicine; zero tolerance in Hungary.  I am amazed at how quickly drink/drive culture has changed in the UK and US.  Same for seat belts.  Its gone from when I was a kid practically everybody ignoring drink/drive laws and seat belts to one generation later my kid never dreaming of not using a seat belt or taking one drink and driving.  Gotta say this is some of the finest work either government has done in my lifetime. 

Ciao

[Mark Saltzman]

Sean, it's hard to comprehend the 3kmh allowance. When driving my previous rental car, when my speedometer read 100kmh my GPS said I was going 94kmh. I was safe in that case since I may have been going slower than I thought, but the sucker that gets a speedometer off by 6kmh the other way is f***ed!

[Sean_A]

Sean, it's hard to comprehend the 3kmh allowance. When driving my previous rental car, when my speedometer read 100kmh my GPS said I was going 94kmh. I was safe in that case since I may have been going slower than I thought, but the sucker that gets a speedometer off by 6kmh the other way is f***ed!

Its my understanding that most car manufacturers buffer the speedo by about 2-3 mph.  Meaning if your speedo reads 70 mph you are probably doing closer to 67. 

I have become well accustomed to big brother watching me in the UK. Cameras for this, that and the other are all over the place.  Soon, there will be no cops on the street.  They will hang out with fireman playing cards and wait for texts  . 

Well at least folks have found a good use for cruise control to get thru all the variable and average speed zones  .

Ciao

[Mark Saltzman]

Sean, you live in England, I live in Canada and we're talking about Australia...why are you talking in mph?

[Mark_F]

Sean, it's hard to comprehend the 3kmh allowance. When driving my previous rental car, when my speedometer read 100kmh my GPS said I was going 94kmh. I was safe in that case since I may have been going slower than I thought, but the sucker that gets a speedometer off by 6kmh the other way is f***ed!

Mark,

Sean is right - manufacturers build in a 5-6 kmh buffer so that you go under the speed limit.  But you have to pay attention, because, as I mentioned above, many roads in Melbourne change speed limits seemingly without foundation, within the space of a few hundred metres.  And you can rest assured the speed camera operators will be waiting for you to make a mistake like doing 70 kmh because that's what the sign was 50 metres behind you before it changed to 60.

[Chris Kane]

The 3kmh represents the tolerance for inaccuracy in the speed gun: ie if you're clocked at 67 it will be reported as 64. So you can do 63 in a 60 zone but not 64.

I've found that conforming to the speed limit is a very effective way to avoid these 'ridiculous' rules - the bonus being that they're a tax on stupidity and arrogance.

[Mark_F]

I've found that conforming to the speed limit is a very effective way to avoid these 'ridiculous' rules - the bonus being that they're a tax on stupidity and arrogance.

Much like the GST on Barristers' wigs, I guess.

Still, I guess someone who was chauffeured to the local 7-11 would have that viewpoint.

[Ben Jarvis]

There are more than 10 posts in this thread relating to the ludicrous speed cameras. Perhaps we should start talking about the great things in Melbourne again?

One that hasn't been mentioned yet is the tour of the Melbourne Cricket Ground (MCG). Any sports fan should make time for this!

[Michael Wharton-Palmer]

Sean, you live in England, I live in Canada and we're talking about Australia...why are you talking in mph?

By jove sir, you cannot possibly expect and Englishman to communicate in that KM mumbo jumbo...we in the Empire will never use that stuff

[Matthew Rose]

Ah Melbourne.... it's a pretty happening place. If you can put up with it being on fire two months out of the year, and the fact that you need two days if you want to travel there, then everything else about it is wonderful.

So far my only sandbelt experience was a round at Commonwealth and a couple of trips to Huntingdale and Victoria for the Aussie Masters and Open, respectively. I've also played another Aussie Open venue which was the championship course at Moonah Links, which was kind of a misnomer and an okay course but it didn't really feel like it was worthy of hosting the most significant tournament in the land. All the time I spent in Melbourne (enough to become a dual citizen) wasn't enough to get me on the Royal.... both times I had letters that were never answered. I also had a chance to play Metro, but the green fee was too high for a soon-to-be-married 25 year-old with no job.

It's become a bit less liveable I think since I was last there.... mind you, it's still pretty liveable (it always seems to be on top or near the top of those silly lists) but I think the weakness of our dollar and the strength of their economy relative to everyone else's has made it a very expensive place to live, and I'm really not a fan of the new government.

If you can, get to the Melbourne Cricket Ground and watch an AFL match. Yes, they are trying to take the violence out of it, like any other sport these days, but it is still very much worth watching. They play at a few venues, but the MCG is the spiritual home of the sport, and if you can get there on a day when two of Essendon, Richmond, Carlton, Hawthorn, or Collingwood are playing each other and you might get 80-90 thousand spectators, usually split 50/50 in support. Some of the diehards, especially those who follow Collingwood, must be seen and heard to be believed. I have to say, I really got into it when I was there.

Melbourne's a pretty awesome place.... it's just too damn hot and too damn far away. But it can steal your heart if you aren't careful... I ended up marrying a Melbourne girl and wouldn't have it any other way.

[Mark_F]

Historical Melbourne - there are a fair number of historical sites in Melbourne, which give a fantastic glimpse into the past.

Rippon Lea and the nearby Como House are wonderful examples of historical homesteads, and something unique to Melbourne; classy and elegant, they obviously wouldn't be found in Sydney.

                                             

The Old Mebourne Gaol in the CBD, complete with gallows and ghosts, is a wonderful reminder of how criminals deserve to be treated but sadly aren't anymore.

                                             

The Block Arcade in Collins Street is a terrific example of an old world shopping experience.
                     

Cooks Cottage in the Fitzroy gardens was built in England, due to the strike action of rampant CFMEU members, then shipped to Australia and reassembled.
                             

The gardens themselves are a lovely spot, located in close proximity to the Victorian Parliament, should you have a wish to wander in and see grown men paid a hundred grand a year act like five year olds fighting in a sandpit.

[Mark Saltzman]

+1 for the Old Melbourne Gaol. They simulate the experience of being locked up. Even though it's for maybe only a minute, it's downright scary! (And cavity searches are threatened but thankfully not completed).

[Sean_A]

I really like arcades and other indoor alleys mixed in with outdoor shops.  Its a great pity so many have disappeared over the years.  There used to be a a huge series of arcades (passages) running through Paris, most of which were destroyed when the boulevards were built.  Does Melbourne have a series of arcades or the odd one or two dotted about?

Ciao

[Mark Chaplin]

Matthew you will find since Paul Rak took over as GM there is a very different attitude at Royal Melbourne, it's still expensive though if you so not have reciprocal rights.

As for speeding Melbourne is small enough that leaving 5 minutes early avoids the risk, simplez.

[Sean Walsh]

Sean A,

I think 1 or 2 dotted about is the more apt description but there is also a combination of narrow lane-ways generally filled with better than average cafe's and restaurants. It really does have a very good vibe in parts of the city.  Other parts, not so much, especially after a certain hour. 

As for speed limits. They are strict and the cameras don't give a lot of leeway but a little more than Mark and Chris suggest.  Sorry I can't really go into by how much other than to say as a rule of thumb if you go past a camera and are more than 10% over the limit expect a ticket.  As Chris says your speed as checked will be discounted by either 2 or 3 km/h depending on the device used.  As for getting pulled over a reasonably strict view of the limits is encouraged.  However officers still do possess some discretion.  I always found "Sorry officer.... as a good opening gambit and much more likely to engender sympathetic feelings than..."what have I done wrong (followed by) haven't you got real criminals to catch or I pay your wages....

The attitude to drink driving in Victoria is very much a zero tolerance approach.  If you're drinking leave the car at the hotel.  That probably means chancing the variable quality of our taxis but the lesser of two evils. 

RJ,

Hopefully I'll get to catch up with you face to face and tell you a few names we have for our traffic orientated brethren... (of which I am not one)

Mark,
Glad to hear RM has loosened up a bit.  Philip was a little taken aback at how inflexible they were one day while he was playing there. As for Melbourne being small I believe it is one of the largest, least densely populated cities in the world.  One of the things that will continue to erode liveability (for want of a better term) if one of our successive governments doesn't bite the bullet and crack down on the sprawl.  Fine for all those in the leafy inner suburbs less so for those in barren, public transport starved outer suburbs. 

As for visiting Melbourne, I would personally avoid January and February.  There's just too much chance you'll hit a full week of 35+ temps and that's really no fun playing golf in.

[Tom Kelly]

I'd agree with most of the suggestions so far.

What's the name of the shopping centre in the CBD built around the old building, an old granary maybe? Not an arcade, but I thought it was pretty cool as far as shopping goes.

The museums around Fed square and the National gallery over the bridge are worth a look (I loved the Aboriginal art) before a wander down the Southbank or heading into the Botanical Gardens. If your an F1 fan a walk/drive around the track in Albert Park is a cool experience. Seeing the infrastructure being setup in preparation for the race was great especially when your free to walk down the track with barriers up and everything on your way to the driving range! A BBQ out on one of the many public ones in Abert Park or at one of the beaches is abit of a tradition worth doing too. If you can do it with some aussie rules or cricket going on in the background even better. A walk down to the penguins under the pier in St Kilda is also nice to do one evening as the sun goes down with fish & chips in hand...the chips are a poor effort but the fish is nearly always great. You've just go to hope there aren't any idiots about scaring the penguins off.

A trip down the Great Ocean Road is great as is Phillips Island.

You are as close as your going to get to Tasmania too...it's worth the effort and not just for the golf in Bridport.


I think I'm always going to regret not making more effort to see Royal Melbourne whilst I was there. I was a skint backpacker so couldn't afford the green fee, large parts of the course were closed anyway as they were re-seeding/turfing the course in preparation for the Presidents Cup. I wrote a letter to the club asking if I would be able to have a look around, but got no response. I'm sure if I'd asked a few of the guys I met whilst I was out there nicely enough though they could have arranged for me to poke my head in. Stupid of me not to try harder!

But at least it gives me a good excuse to make another trip back down under.

[Tom Kelly]

As for Melbourne being small I believe it is one of the largest, least densely populated cities in the world. 

It doesn't half sprawl!

[Thomas Dai]

No mention of Melbourne icons like Dame Edna, Sir Les, Shane? No mention on the Sydney thread of Kevin Wilson either!
atb

[Matthew Rose]

The lady pros are at Victoria this week for their Open.... one of the better sandbelt tracks, but maybe a step below Royal and KH. Looks about as dry as it did when I attended the men's Open there 10 or so years ago.

I'm hungry for some good fish and chips now.... love good Aussie fish and chips. The best places always seem to be those little tiny holes in the wall near the waterfront owned by a single family of Greek or Lebanese immigrants.

[Mark_F]

I'm hungry for some good fish and chips now.... love good Aussie fish and chips. The best places always seem to be those little tiny holes in the wall near the waterfront owned by a single family of Greek or Lebanese immigrants.

Matthew,

You will find most fish and chip shops are now owned by Chinese. 

Still the same quality though - Australian fish and chips are vastly superior to their putrid pommy equivalent.