Most Outrageous day of Golf?

[ForkaB]

As for myself, how about.....

12AM-3AM:  large Macallan's and pints of beer, singing and doing party pieces and philosophising and womanising with 20-30 other maniacs from all over the world.

3AM-9AM:  Sleep

9AM-9:30AM:  Breakfast

9:30AM-12:30PM: 18 holes at Dornoch

12:30PM-2PM: Lunch and 4 pints

2PM-5PM  18 Holes at Dornoch

5PM-7PM:  More pints, sleep, bath, nookie, do the Times crossword, dress

7PM-8:30 PM:  review the state of play over large gin and tonics

8:30PM-10PM:  Dinner

10PM-12PM  large Macallan's and pints of beer, singing and doing party pieces and philosophising and womanising with 20-60 other golf mad maniacs from all over the world.

Repeat for 1-3 months every summer from 1981-1990.

[Dan Kelly]

Rihc --

Who you tryin' to make jealous?

Us -- or yourself?!

Or both?

[Steve Lapper]

While this doesn't quite necessitate a new thread, my most outrageous NIGHT of golf was late this summer. A friend had two pairs of very very high-tech US Special Forces night vision goggles that we donned and played 4 holes with at our nearby local club.

We used both regular balls and special glowing (green) balls and proceeded to play 4 holes before we were confronted by the club's security (he heard my cheering for my friend's birdie putt!).

It was huge fun and we vowed to do it again next year with an earlier start and preapproval. I struggled with revealing this due to the potential for people to begin to sneak onto the classic, but alas it was way too much fun to keep to myself.

  I am planning visits to ANGC et.al. ...anybody interested??

[Mike_Sweeney]

After reading The Man Formerly Known as Dave post, I was ready to quit this board. Now I finally have a way to play ANGC, so I must stay. When should we go to Georgia, and where do we get the goggles ?

[Scott_Burroughs]

Nude crossword puzzling, Rich?  Interesting post-coital ritual to say the least....

Going 23 hours post-nookie without bathing?  Could get itchy....or was the nookie in the bath at the time?    

Why have I turned into JakaB all of a sudden?

[Joel_Stewart]

While this doesn't quite necessitate a new thread, my most outrageous NIGHT of golf was late this summer. A friend had two pairs of very very high-tech US Special Forces night vision goggles that we donned and played 4 holes with at our nearby local club.

Steve:
Some guy in San Diego pulled the same stunt a year ago when Vice President Cheney was staying at some hotel/resort/golf club.  The secret service spotted the guy and he was arrested, and later plead guilty to trespassing.  

Isn't it hard to swing with those things on your head?

[Mike Benham]

5PM-7PM:  More pints, sleep, bath, nookie, do the Times crossword, dress

A poll should be taken as to which one of the above "events" to the most time during the 2-hour timeframe.

As Scott alluded to, did any of the above events occur together?  Pints/bath, sleep/bath, crossword/bath ...

[klangone]

I have 2 days I remember fondly:

1) wake up, tee it up at Chicago Golf Club at 6:30am, end at 9:45 am......drive to local airport and take private jet to Frankfort, MI and have tee in the ground at Crystal Downs 1:00 pm.....end 18 at the Downs at 4:30pm.....fly back to Illinois and have dinner in Chicago that night

2) take ferry to Fishers Island and play Fishers at 9:30am......finish at 12:30pm and fly to Newport for tee in the ground at 2:00pm......end at 5:30pm and fly back to NYC for dinner

[Steve Lapper]

Joel,

    I can only imagine the very real trouble one could get into with those things. The pair we wore were not that heavy, nor bulky. Instead, they felt like wearing a pair of small kaliedescopes glued onto glasses and once gotten used to, didn't interfere with my otherwise impaired (and need of repair) swing.
   I was tempted to borrow them and put them to further use, but better reason prevailed. I really do look forward to playing with them again sometime. It is near impossible to lose a ball with them on.

[mike_malone]

 I thought that when Scott Burroughs played Rolling Green  (south of Philadelphia Pa.)starting around 10am then drove to play Yale (Conn.)the same day it was pretty outrageous.

[Scott_Burroughs]

Mike,

I've told that story before on here (we had a similar thread some time ago) and always makes for a good story in person.  Could only be done in mid-to-late June when the days are the longest.  That day I drove from suburban Balt, MD through DE to PA, played RG at 10:00 (walked w/caddie), left at 2:00, drove through PA, NJ, NY, and into CT, got to Yale at 5:30, teed off at 5:45 (walked and carried), and finished at dusk.  Had dinner, then drove back through CT, NY, and into NJ, staying in Piscataway.  Watched NHL finals game that went into 3 OTs until late.


I liked Shivas' story and was jealous of Rich's.

[ForkaB]

Dan

Myself.  Those were the days, with the emphasis on "were"...........

Scott and Mike

I oversimplified.  All of the listed activities could occur during any part of each 24-hour session, only occasionally simultaneously.

[Tommy Williamsen]

8:00 18 holes west course at Wentworth with my best friend on my fiftieth birthday.
10:30 12 holes on the east course
12:00  14 holes on the Edinburgh course
2:30 18 holes Sunningdale new
5:30 11 holes on Suynningdale old  End because of darkness.
ALL THE HOLES WERE WALKED WHILE WE PULLED A CART. oBVIOUSLY we spent little time putting.

It wasn't my intention to play such a convoluted number of holes on some of the courses but we had to play when two ball was permitted.  For those that don't understand many clubs in England reserve one couse for two ball of foursomes and one course for fourball.  

[A.G._Crockett]

This will be a bit different:

Second hole of a tournament round (first day of a two day Georgia HS coaches' tournament) I was hit flush on the side of the head by a golf ball hit with a three-wood from about 30 yds. away.  I went down like I had been shot, and couldn't get up for several minutes, though I never lost conciousness.  Blood everywhere...

We took a wet towel and cleaned me up a bit, only to find that a piece of my right ear was missing; it looked exactly like Holyfield's ear after Tyson bit him.  All four of us were trained to deal with head injuries, and I knew I wasn't going to die, or something crazy like that, so I played on.  

For the remainder of the 4 hours, I would hold the blood-soaked towel to my ear until it was my turn to play, throw it down, hit, then put the towel back since the ear wouldn't stop bleeding.  I was so dizzy that I had trouble making good full swings, but I have NEVER, before or since, putted as well.  For the remaining 16 holes, I had 4 birdies, 3 doubles, and a triple!  (Shot the proudest 84 of my life!)

As soon as the round was over, we headed back to the Emergency Room at the hospital in Brunswick; Friday night, and LOTS going on.  By the time I finally saw the doctor, I had been seeping blood for about 7 hours.  There was, unfortunately, nothing to stitch up, so he put on a "pressure wrap" to get the bleeding stopped, which consisted of a huge turban that I had to wear for the rest of the weekend, and told me that I'd need plastic surgery when I got back home.  (This was in fact the case.)  Sent me on my bloodsoaked way with a prescription for antibiotics.

The next day, played not only with the turban, and a badly swollen face, but with diaarhea from the antibiotics, and shot 85 while fighting the worst day for "no-see-um's"  (a truly vicious coastal bug, for those of you not familiar with the SE coast) that I've ever experienced.

To this day (almost 10 years later) I get reminded of this by coaches from all over the state.  It is a testimony to my poor golf game that I am best known for this performance, but I'm still really, really proud of finishing that round.

However, the call home to tell my wife what happened really didn't go well, but that's another story...

[THuckaby2]

AGC:  That settles it, you are a he-man fighter jock man among men.  Well done.

But it's funny, as I was reading along in that, the thought occurred to me - "I wonder what my wife would say if I did something like that?"

So your last line had me most definitely laughing out loud.  I'm sure words such as "fool", and "what were you thinking" must have come up in that conversation, eh?  

TH

[Dan Kelly]

A.G._C --

If Rihc had included a bit of ritual ear-chomping in his '80s golf days, he'd have you!

But as of this moment, you're the winner, baby!

Can anyone top A.G._C? Please? I need the entertainment!

[Dan Kelly]

As for myself, how about.....

12AM-3AM:  large Macallan's and pints of beer, singing and doing party pieces and philosophising and womanising with 20-30 other maniacs from all over the world.

3AM-9AM:  Sleep

9AM-9:30AM:  Breakfast

9:30AM-12:30PM: 18 holes at Dornoch

12:30PM-2PM: Lunch and 4 pints

2PM-5PM  18 Holes at Dornoch

5PM-7PM:  More pints, sleep, bath, nookie, do the Times crossword, dress

7PM-8:30 PM:  review the state of play over large gin and tonics

8:30PM-10PM:  Dinner

10PM-12PM  large Macallan's and pints of beer, singing and doing party pieces and philosophising and womanising with 20-60 other golf mad maniacs from all over the world.

Repeat for 1-3 months every summer from 1981-1990.

Now that I look at this again, it seems likely that Rihc just forgot to mention the ritual ear-chomping.

[RJ_Daley]

There must be something equivalent to a purple heart medal in the game of golf...AG Crockett, you have just got to be related to Davey...  who  "killed him a bar" when he was only three!  

[ForkaB]

I'm not sure if this will top AG's superb reminescence, but I shall try......

There is/was an apocryphal story at Dornoch about the local Chemist (Pharmacist) who used to enter the Carnegie Shield in the 60's out of civic duty, despite being an extremely ability challenged golfer.  The story goes/went that he took a huge hoick with his driver on the 1st tee, completely missed the ball, but managed to hit it solidly with the back of his club as he untwisted himself, sending the ball merrily bakcwards down the hill away from the tee (and the fairway) towards the tennis court.  Finding himself up against the chicken wire, being determined to complete the round properly and not knowing all the relief options of the "unplayable lie" rule, he hacked away until he had freed the ball and was deemed to be lying 8 after he finally managed to propel a pelota past the 1st tee.

I got a good bit of mileage out of that story until one lunchtime in the mid-80's at the bar of the Burghfield House Hotel when a gentleman previously quietly sitting at one of the banquettes piped up with:  "I was the Chemist's partner that day."

The partner, who had spent the last 20+ years in Australia, added a few fillips to the story, most notably that:

--on about the 13th the Chemist had run out of golf balls and had to borrow some new ones from his partner
--on the 16th, he had strayed towards the edge of the old quarry to the left, lost his balance and tumbled down into the gorse, breaking his leg in two places.
--Despite the broken leg he had completed the round (with a score closer to 200 than 100)

No lost ear that I know of, however.......

[Dan Kelly]

There must be something equivalent to a purple heart medal in the game of golf...AG Crockett, you have just got to be related to Davey...  who  "killed him a bar" when he was only three!  

Reminds me of an item in my column, lo these many years ago.

The date: 9/16/1992.

The headline: "Davy Crockett dead, in bar mishap, at 3."

Under the heading "Blinded by the lyrics," I ran this note from one Eric of Eagan: "Back in the 1950s, there was a No. 1 record about 'Davy Crockett, king of the wild frontier' -- and for 25 years, my wife thought that Davy was 'killed in a bar when he was only 3.' "

And then came Jackie of Shoreview: "There's a song called `I Believe in Miracles' -- and my husband, for years, thought it was 'I believe in milk cows.' "

BULLETIN BOARD [Dan notes: C'est moi!] REPLIED: And who doesn't?

[RJ_Daley]

AG...AG Crockett, king of the y'd front ear!