Dear Ed,
We've not yet met and played together. I just read your post and as a father of two daughters of 16 and 13 can't even start to relate. My youngest underwent some really scary testing recently involving a brain scan and a DAT scan and even that and waiting for the results was more than I care to ever endure and that with clean results. I found myself thinking if something is going to be wrong with somebody in the family let it be me rather than her. I guess that's likely a parent's normal reaction.
I'll pray that golf can play a role in helping you through this time and in cherishing the wonderful memories you have had with the two of you together on the links.
I wish you and your family immense strength in your mourning process. I'd also like to share my favorite poem from Kahlil Gibran about children with you, perhaps you know it. I realize it may have different meaning to different people but do hope it's appropriate:
On Children
Your children are not your children.
They are the sons and daughters of Life's longing for itself.
They come through you but not from you,
And though they are with you yet they belong not to you.
You may give them your love but not your thoughts,
For they have their own thoughts.
You may house their bodies but not their souls,
For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow,
which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.
You may strive to be like them,
but seek not to make them like you.
For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.
You are the bows from which your children
as living arrows are sent forth.
The archer sees the mark upon the path of the infinite,
and He bends you with His might
that His arrows may go swift and far.
Let your bending in the archer's hand be for gladness;
For even as He loves the arrow that flies,
so He loves also the bow that is stable.