Reading through the (occasionally heated) comments on the thread would appear to indicate:
1) Every member (obviously) has a bias to their club - Some are more passionate than others but that bias will always be there. Both JKs did a really good job of presenting their thoughts in what seemed to be as matter a fact a manner as possible on this thread. I would be pretty surprised if a BN or DR member (or owner) scored the other course the winner in this match. Two different courses, two different experiences, even if you isolate them hole by hole the bias that a golfer has for a "certain" type of golf experience will shine through. Furthermore, if you took 100 golfers who were not members at either club and had a chance to play both on the same trip they would probably be fairly evenly split as well. Not that it matters, because at the end of the day the only opinion that really counts is your own. And then it only really matters if you are planning on dropping some cheddar to join one or the other.
2) Ballyneal and Dismal River compete for members, and they don't. They compete for national members, with other "destination" clubs, by appearing on the radar of potential golfers who have made a decision to join a private club that they are willing to travel to (often over long distances). Where they don't compete is the unique experience that each club provides. I would be shocked to meet someone who having played both says - "I'm just torn, I don't know which to join, they are so similar."
3) The differences between the clubs are HUGELY beneficial to each. The location, scenery, courses, club house(s), lodging, culture, etc. lead to completely unique experiences.
At the end of the day, it is kind of fun, maybe thought provoking or at least amusing, to compare courses (or even holes) side by side, and then to digress to discussions about the clubs and which is better, different, etc.
But IMO, the fact of the matter is, Ballyneal and Dismal River (and Sand Hills and Kingsley and etc.) cannot be compared to one another in any meaningful way because each place appeals to a different consumer within a subset who are seeking out a "private destination golf club".
Probably the most interesting aspect of the DR and BN Boxing Match is that, over a big enough sample size, there are likely only a few points in scoring between them. So, like any ranking, it's pretty much splitting hairs when you are comparing great courses . . . that at the end of the day are actually quite different. Or something.