Top 5 things that chap your ass while golfing

[JLahrman]

I don't know that I have anything to add to the fine list, but..

Clowns who leave broken tees all over the box.

I actually like broken tees on the box. Given that I only need a full tee with my driver, I often will reuse a broken tee that I find lying on a teebox. Sustainable golf.

[Bob_Garvelink]

Hey Gang,

What are some things that bug you?  I love the game of golf and its my main hobby but there are a few things that get under my skin.

5.  Guys who smack the dirt off their shoes in the parking lot.....who is supposed to clean that mess up?

4.  A stale hotdog bun.....eating stale bread reminds me of eating a bad piece of  cheese.  I expect nothing but the best when dealing with both!

3.  The cheapskate tipper in your group who won't take care of the golf staff.  Guys will spend $1000 on a golf trip or $400 on a driver but won't tip a cart boy properly when the young chap is trying to put his way through college

2.  The golfer who yells "f***" every other word.  Lets keep it classy gents

1.  The "pervert" golfer in your group who goes a little over bored when flirting with the cart girl.  She is so young she could be his daughter

Guys like Bob Garvelink.

GJ Bailey,

Ouch...why me?

You went there to play golf, not to worry about any dirt that may get on the parking lot.
You went there to play golf, not to eat.
You went there to play golf, not ride around in a cart.
You choose to write words on the website that are not appreciated by the website owner.
You apparently support the obscene thing known as a beverage cart. You went there to play golf, not buy drinks from a cart and hold up play.

Are you putting words in Ran's mouth?   How do you know he doesn't appreciate anything Bob said?

He has requested certain obscene words not be posted. The reason you don't see one posted above is because I mitigated it in my original reply.

GJ Bailey and the entire GCA clan,

I apologize for my poor choice of words.  If I have offended you or anyone else on this site please accept my deepest apologies. 

Bob

[astavrides]

.

[JLahrman]

I don't know that I have anything to add to the fine list, but..

Clowns who leave broken tees all over the box.

I actually like broken tees on the box. Given that I only need a full tee with my driver, I often will reuse a broken tee that I find lying on a teebox. Sustainable golf.

yeah, but it would be good if they were at least piled just outside the right tee marker instead of having to move 3 or 4 of them just to take a stance on the tee box.

I can just kick them out of the way if I need to. If they're piled outside the tee marker, then I have to bend over twice which defeats the purpose.

[Howard Riefs]

Painfully slow play

Sandbaggers

Incessant unsolicited critiques of my swing

Unabashed self adulation (e.g., "Wow. Did you see? I hit another wonderful shot!")

Public access courses that don't warn in advance they recently aerated

Incompetent caddies -- especially at $100/round

Missing rakes

Lateness on the first tee

[Jim Hoak]

People who pound their tees into the ground.  Looks terrible and hard on maintenance.
People who say "golfing, instead of "playing golf."

[Mark Woodger]

at some time or another i am guilty of some or all of the things mentioned on this list. i apologise to anybody who has golfed with me.

The number one has to be slow play. but more specifically people who don't give a sh*t about the fact that others are on the course and meander along at their own pace. Be fcking considerate to others and get a move on. When you get to your ball by all means take your time within reason, but between shots you need to be aware that you are slow and get walking at a good speed.

The is an issue particularly with US public access courses where the concept of letting somebody through just does not exist.

[Garland Bayley]

Where did Ran say that?  And Bob did put quotes around his obscenity there in the OP.  

My recollection was in his yearly post after having booted Barney, the Emperor, and Flemma the previous year.

[Garland Bayley]

...
Green Chairmen who don't know Alister MacKenzie from Mackenzie Phillips.
...

Heck, I wish there was at least one person on the committee that could recognize TOC.

[Kevin_Reilly]

I left one off the list...and it can replace any of the above:

The person that takes 2-3 practice swings, with each one bringing up a divot.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-_-d-LrxpVo

[Sean_A]

I saw Bob's "Pure Michigan" tag and thought of Not so spoofs.  This thread is so bad it deserves a highjacking.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ae_SxDnD2W4

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VDCCcxlKzDU

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9FJoRxT6B5g

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=01Kz6Rw99Kk


Ciao

[Ronald Montesano]

thanks, Gringo...now come clean my shorts.

[Bob_Garvelink]

El Gringo,

Well done Sir 

[astavrides]

.

[Carl Johnson]

3.  The cheapskate tipper in your group who won't take care of the golf staff.  Guys will spend $1000 on a golf trip or $400 on a driver but won't tip a cart boy properly when the young chap is trying to put his way through college

What about "over-tippers"?  E.g., private club's policy is that tipping is not expected - staff members are paid well, at rates where tipping should not be expected.  However, policy also says, for exceptional service dropping a dollar would be o.k. (but still not expected).  Nevertheless, more than a few members still provide relatively good tips (more than $1) for normal service.  This grates on me because now I feel like I've got to tip, too.  I would not go so far as to say it "chaps my a . . . " but it does bug me a little.  Note: I am not a cheap tipper - in situations where tipping is normal and expected, I am generous.

[Ronald Montesano]

the wind, especially when I'm playing in cheekless chaps (thank you, no applause necessary...)

[Bill_McBride]

the wind, especially when I'm playing in cheekless chaps (thank you, no applause necessary...)

Wow, that's a memory I'm really sorry you have dredged up - Mardi Gras 1980.  (No, I wasn't wearing them, unfortunately saw several fellows wearing them on Bourbon St).   It was a chilly Mardi Gras......

[BHoover]

I've already offered up my five, but I have to add a couple more...

Mandatory carts and mandatory caddies (except when I'm playing as a guest). Generally speaking, there's no reason not to allow a golfer to have the option to carry his/her own bag. I don't use one, but I also think it's ridiculous that push carts are looked down upon here in the USA. If folks in the UK and Australia can use them, why not here? Seems to me that Bandon has the right approach. Offer caddie services to those who want it, but also allow the golfer to carry or push, as he/she chooses.

[Lester George]

Unrepaired ball marks

People who want to know the architectural significance of every hole/shot/thought as related to playing with the architect

Inappropriate dress

Access whores who complain

People who don't treat their caddy with respect

People who aren't ready when it is their turn

Lester

[Ronald Montesano]

Is Lester one of the things that chaps Lester, or was he just signing off?

[Lester George]

Ronald,

On occasion I must admit I chap myself.  In this case I was just signing off.

Lester