I agree there is no one answer. In reading this thread what came over clear to me is, it is very different in the UK than in the USA and in that respect, you have got a much tougher problem than here in the UK where money is less of an issue as we dont really have food and beverage minimums and joining/initiation fees exist only in about 25% of clubs now. We have a joining fee which can be spread over 5 years and amounts to £100 or £200 per year on the subscription, if you leave after 2 or 3 years you are not responsible for years 4 and 5. People move around with jobs and situations change. We also have zero join fee for under 29s.
The problem is if we go under 29 free, the next club will go under 30 and another under 32 and so on, getting members, retaining them has become a 'rat race'. In the UK the most important factors are not the course, our culture is very different, proximity and where your mates play weigh heavy in the decsion.
We have been over the dress and phone situations in other threads, and whilst we all have our own hates a relaxed situation is a 90%-10% attract-detract. Some people will like a stricter regime and that will be the reason for them to join as Scott Warren eluded. Its not wrong for him but certainly in the UK its a minor opinion. I dont like hats back to front, I dont really mind hats worn in the clubhouse, I dont like jewellery in mens heads or tattoos....I accept I am a minor opinion though and must shut up. White vans in the car park will cause some offence to some....this list goes on of just how the barriers have fallen. The majority of our members change in the car park, some days the changing rooms are empty, that is a complete 360 degree turn from the days when I started playing golf.
This thread is interesting also in how you define 'Younger' members, some of you see it as high as under 40. The world has changed as is changing, clubs can chose to be snobotoriums and that will suit some, those I suspect will be the sinkers over time. In 15 years I know of 1 course that was the best in town and now is the one that has gone to ratshit.... it chose the snobotorium route.