Thank you, John. I've got a lot to work with here.
I don't "want" anything from the group, except for them to read my essay. I want them to think about it. I fancy myself a writer these days, and now and then I think up a good story to tell. In my opinion, a good story makes people think; hopefully the readers will interpret the story in different ways. I was quite nervous about posting this essay. It is a wild story to post here, with seemingly distant ties to golf course analysis, but it has served its purpose. The responses are varied and interesting. My theory is that analytical people like me populate this site.
I did not intend to make this a sob story about my life. I have received a few friendly messages from longtime friends suggesting I'm too hard on myself. I am compelled to see the flaws, highlight the mistakes I've made, but the greater message I'm trying to convey is: I'm 52, I'm still learning about myself every year, I'm still figuring out what to do with that knowledge, and I'm equipped to do this better than you can. And yes, I really like girls.
In the Ratatouille quote, the great critic Anton Ego says:
"But the bitter truth we critics must face is that, in the grand scheme of things, the average piece of junk is more meaningful than our criticism designating it so."
If we are not here to judge and assess golf courses, why does Golf Club Atlas exist? I thought the purpose of the website, the overriding passion of this website, is to analyze and evaluate what makes golf enjoyable. It is not a fool's game, as you suggest. There are tangible, measurable aspects of golf courses which compel many of us to evaluate them.
I've been collecting music since I was a kid, and when I received my first iPod for Christmas in 2004, I started transferring music into it. The project snowballed into a full blown quest to create the ideal collection for a typical guy my age. What methodology do I use to create the best collection, without spending undue time reviewing music to identify the best songs?
I refer to music reviews, and analyze the writing of critics before me who've already done the strenuous work of identifying the best songs. I take their suggestions and filter them through my own lens to determine my list. That's the only way I have a fighting chance to present the reader with a strong list of songs to suggest.
Similarly, we use this website to identify which golf courses sound good to us, and seem worth the effort and money to play. Critics matter because they help us narrow the list, so we can find what we like best without excessive investigation.
Now, you and I engaged in what I consider a fine debate by comparing The Riviera and Sand Hills golf courses. You are clearly capable of engaging in debate and criticism. Like me, you choose to critique in a positive manner, though it's hard to find fault with the two grand subjects. It was great fun, and I loved participating. But I must ask you, if you are not here to evaluate golf courses, why do you participate?
I do not have the gift of universal taste discernment. I am programmed to evaluate and assess. I am competitive about it.
"But there are times when a critic truly risks something, and that is in the discovery and defense of the new."
Several people latched onto this part of the Anton Ego speech, thinking I was alluding to my support for new courses. I knew it was there, but it wasn't trying to make a big deal about it. I like all golf courses.
If I had to write it again, I might have left out my disillusionment with the country club social scene. But I'm a bit weary of it. I'm tired of golf in general. I've earned my degree in course analysis, I've played the best I'll ever play, and there's nothing left except to make friends. However, there's a subtle, secondary message I'm trying to make. Golf Club Atlas is a very exclusive club, where we are able to gain access to many of the country's best golf clubs. If you are not here to "promote frank commentary on golf courses", Ran Morrissett's own words, then why are you, meaning all participants, here?