[JMEvensky]

You know what this thread has done -- it has reminded me..no, pointed a stern finger at me...about how much of a pig I've been for the last decade, smoking cigarettes on the course one after the other and stamping them out on the fairways and tees, leaving butts around all over.  Until today I comforted myself with the thought that I never lit one or put one out on a green....but this thread has rid me of that comfort. if I smoke on a golf course (and I'm trying to quit that too), from now one a bring a tin or bag with me a picky up all my butts.  I'm sorry...really....suddenly I can't believe how inconsiderate Ive been.

Peter

Peter,it's the filters which cause the problem.So,either rip off the filters and put them in your pocket or start smoking Camels.

[Peter Pallotta]

Jeff - funny you should say that....Camels are my cigarettes (discovered them on my first trip to New York just when I started smoking, and they were so much better than Canadian cigarettes), but after a few years of smoking the plain (i.e. filterless) kind I switched to the filters around the time I took up golf...and it's true that those filters are those worst part. I really did mean that, btw -- I think of myself as a considerate fellow, and it really didn't strike me until today how thoughtless Ive been in this regard.

Peter

[JMEvensky]

Jeff - funny you should say that....Camels are my cigarettes (discovered them on my first trip to New York just when I started smoking, and they were so much better than Canadian cigarettes), but after a few years of smoking the plain (i.e. filterless) kind I switched to the filters around the time I took up golf...and it's true that those filters are those worst part. I really did mean that, btw -- I think of myself as a considerate fellow, and it really didn't strike me until today how thoughtless Ive been in this regard.

Peter

Marlboros,flip top box for me.

I used to say that sand traps were the world's largest ash trays until a Super explained to me that the filters clog up the drainage lines.Aesthetics aside,filters are a bad problem.

Maybe you could store the butts in your tucked in sweater?

[Tim Martin]

Jeff - funny you should say that....Camels are my cigarettes (discovered them on my first trip to New York just when I started smoking, and they were so much better than Canadian cigarettes), but after a few years of smoking the plain (i.e. filterless) kind I switched to the filters around the time I took up golf...and it's true that those filters are those worst part. I really did mean that, btw -- I think of myself as a considerate fellow, and it really didn't strike me until today how thoughtless Ive been in this regard.

Peter

Marlboros,flip top box for me.

I used to say that sand traps were the world's largest ash trays until a Super explained to me that the filters clog up the drainage lines.Aesthetics aside,filters are a bad problem.

Maybe you could store the butts in your tucked in sweater?

Peter-Do you ever regret that you let the board in on your conscious decision to tuck in your sweater?

[Bill_McBride]

I only spit on Ted Robinson courses.

I sincerely hope not Tokatee!

[C. Squier]

Why not just masturbate at the same time after all its just body fluids, no you would not dream of doing that in public, for some reason you may hesitate, well just do the same the next time you decide that you may want to spit. Show some respect for others on the course, simple Etiquette or is it just too simple for some to understand.

Unbelievable.  The one post you don't make ANY statement about carts or distance aids.  The hilarity of the combination of masturbation/carts/distance aids would finally make the bullshit you write somewhat palatable. 

The village idiot keeps his crown.

[Dan Kelly]

Someone asked if anybody here hadn't spat on the course or green,  I have not.

When I watch the World Series of baseball on TV and see theses icons spewing whatever is in their mouth onto the perimeter of the dugout, I want to throw up.

Bob

Couldn't agree more, sir.

I have exactly the same feeling about the recently ubiquitous words "icon" and "iconic" -- except, of course, when they're used, as you're using "icons," sarcastically. Icons of boorishness!

Dan

P.S. to Peter, from one former smoker to one future former smoker: I can't imagine a better anti-smoking program than carrying around a container for your spent butts. Every time you open it to deposit another, you'll get a good, gross look at (and reek of) what you've been sucking into your lungs. Give it a try. Quitting is the hardest thing I've ever done -- and one of the few things I've ever done about which I've had not a whiff of regret. Good luck, man!

[Garland Bayley]

I only spit on Ted Robinson courses.

I sincerely hope not Tokatee!

Only between tokes and tees.

[Peter Pallotta]

Thanks, Dan - really. I'm just 'back' from my 3rd failed attempt at being non-smoker.  But I do need to keep trying -- my little boy hasn't seen me smoking yet, but I can't keep stepping outside every hour to 'take out the garbage'...he's starting to get suspicious. 

Tim - ha, ha! I might have such regrets...except that I truly believe it's a nice look for me (and therein lies the sadness, eh?) .

[Dan Kelly]

Thanks, Dan - really. I'm just 'back' from my 3rd failed attempt at being non-smoker.  But I do need to keep trying -- my little boy hasn't seen me smoking yet, but I can't keep stepping outside every hour to 'take out the garbage'...he's starting to get suspicious. 

Third? You're just gettin' started!

One of these days, your little boy will say: "Dad -- are you out there EATING the garbage?"

[Peter Pallotta]

Dan - Actually he has already started saying "Wow, papa, we have a lot of garbage today!"...to which i mumble something about all the "recyclables".

Gee -- suddenly someone spitting on a green seems like a rather prim little sin....

Peter

 

[SL_Solow]

Which is worse; spitting on the golf course or mental onanism on this board?

[Dan Kelly]

Which is worse; spitting on the golf course or mental onanism on this board?

Spitting on the golf course. I'm sure you must agree.

You've reminded me of when I first encountered the word "onanism."

It was in a mock edition of my college paper, put out by the college humor society. The Announcements listed a meeting of the Onanism Society at the Learned Hand Auditorium at the law school.

How's that for sophomoric humor?

[Bob_Huntley]

Dan,

Didn't the onanist try it left-handed and felt that he had found a new girl friend?.

We cannot go lower than that....or can we?

Bob

[Colin Macqueen]

Peter P,
Here's a wee tip from one who knew that they were littering the golf course with filter tips.  Find yourself one of the plastic canisters that camera film used to come in. Small, unobtrusive and with a very good snap cap that keeps the rank smell of old dead butts (cigarette) from permeating your golf bag.  Oh...an added bonus is that if you are trying to give up the habit just allow yourself a couple of really deep inhalations from over the top of your canister from time to time. Nothing quite like it!
Hey..... I just thought I guess you could spit in it as well. Melvyn would appreciate the concoction I'm sure!!

Cheers Colin

[Patrick_Mucci]

I really think Tiger is great, but in the groups I play with, spitting on a green is totally unacceptable. At age 50, have I missed something? I don't remember Palmer, Nicklaus, Watson or Price ever hacking up on the course. Just interested on your thoughts.

Arnold Palmer was a chain smoker on the golf course, but, the media/TV avoided showing him smoking.
They protected him in more ways than one.

But, today, everything is "open season" to the media.

The should be subjected to the same level of scrutiny they subject everyone else to.

[Rick Shefchik]

I really think Tiger is great, but in the groups I play with, spitting on a green is totally unacceptable. At age 50, have I missed something? I don't remember Palmer, Nicklaus, Watson or Price ever hacking up on the course. Just interested on your thoughts.

Arnold Palmer was a chain smoker on the golf course, but, the media/TV avoided showing him smoking.
They protected him in more ways than one.

But, today, everything is "open season" to the media.

The should be subjected to the same level of scrutiny they subject everyone else to.

Patrick, when reporters become as interesting to the public as the people they cover, I assure you they will be subject to the same scrutiny. For that matter, some already are.

Put me down among those who have never spat upon a golf course.

[Jason Walker]

[Ronald Montesano]

JNC, his mom and I have gone back and forth on this one on Facebook, so I'll chime in here for shits and giggles.

ARE YOU ALL BRAIN DEAD?

With all the problems we have in the world, you care about saliva?  Couldn't you tell that it was an inadvertent loogie, certainly not as harmful as the one that Keith Hernandez hocked up in Seinfeld?

Didn't you see him wipe it up with his putter in the video?  He made amends for his inadvertent scrock with his beloved Nike or Cameron or Cash-In or whatever he is putting with these days.

I do have allergy issues that cause me to generate an inordinant amount of phlegm.  I do my best to find a proper, quiet place to release said fluids/globules.  If it happens to be the putting green, I step it into the green until it disappears.

Honestly, this is the pleasure police on a twisted ride of mayhem.  Go back to your caves until you find something worthy to contribute to the world.  If you are still pissed at Tiger for what he did, at least man up and admit it.

Where was the thread when Sergio advertently gooed into the cup?  Say what?  There wasn't one?

xoxo (for Valentine's Day in the USA)
El Scumbago Numero Uno

[Brian_Ewen]

A little spit huh? How long is that spit going to stand idle in the baking sun? Not very.

Baking Sun ..... in Scotland ?

[Patrick_Mucci]

Rick Shefchic,

Perhaps you've never seen Savahna Guthrie (sp?), Megyn Kelly, Martha McCallum (sp ?), Gretchen Carlson, and Mika Brzeziniski.

I find them incredibly interesting and wouldn't mind learning anything and everything about any of their vices(;

Ron Montesano,

I agree with you, this is nit picking, politically correct horseshit.

[Colin Macqueen]

Brian,

"Baking Sun ..... in Scotland ?"

Of late it is more likely to become an instant ice-cube (sphere?) a la Melvyn before it has even hit the ground.

Colin

[Bob_Huntley]

JNC, his mom and I have gone back and forth on this one on Facebook, so I'll chime in here for shits and giggles.

ARE YOU ALL BRAIN DEAD?

With all the problems we have in the world, you care about saliva?  Couldn't you tell that it was an inadvertent loogie, certainly not as harmful as the one that Keith Hernandez hocked up in Seinfeld?

Didn't you see him wipe it up with his putter in the video?  He made amends for his inadvertent scrock with his beloved Nike or Cameron or Cash-In or whatever he is putting with these days.

I do have allergy issues that cause me to generate an inordinant amount of phlegm.  I do my best to find a proper, quiet place to release said fluids/globules.  If it happens to be the putting green, I step it into the green until it disappears.

Honestly, this is the pleasure police on a twisted ride of mayhem.  Go back to your caves until you find something worthy to contribute to the world.  If you are still pissed at Tiger for what he did, at least man up and admit it.

Where was the thread when Sergio advertently gooed into the cup?  Say what?  There wasn't one?

xoxo (for Valentine's Day in the USA)
El Scumbago Numero Uno

Ronald,

I see that no one seems to want to spar with you, I will. I have been to a few places where a bit of saliva could kill you. I have also lived under conditions that were less than sterile. You can, if you so wish, ask any contibutor to this forum if I could be called a prig, possibly the opposite.


 Whatever, spitting is a disgusting act, I cannot see how you condone the habit.


Bob

[Garland Bayley]

...
Where was the thread when Sergio advertently gooed into the cup?  Say what?  There wasn't one?
...

Is the reason you claim the title tricks because you are loose with the truth?
No wonder we have Merion threads if the quality of reporting by reporters is at this level.

[Duncan Betts]

Must be a cultural thing.

Here in Australia, I certainly would never spit on a green, or even on the fairway if a fellow golfer is nearby - yet people (including me) think nothing of taking a quick leak in the trees/bushes when nature calls, or just in the rough if playing at a course that isn't treelined.

I'd certainly be interested in Melvyn's thoughts on this subject!

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