[Tom Yost]

A guy does not play golf for 43 years without soiling himself at least once either early or late in his career.

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[Brian Laurent]

Two moments stand out for me...

First was as a spectator at the Pebble Beach Pro-Am when I was about 12 years old...it was a practice round and crowds were somewhat sparse. My family was following Bill Murray and his group on the back nine, it was a little wet and as his group was making their way to the next tee, I slipped and fell down a little mound behind whatever green they just finished playing. Unfortunately, Bill Murray saw me fall and proceeded to give me a nice ribbing for a few minutes. Needless to say, I was pretty embarrassed.

Second memory was a few years later at a Junior Club Match at Philly Cricket Club. While standing around the first tee waiting for my group to be called, a bird thought my shoulder was a nice target for its "droppings." It was a bad start to a bad round (at a great club).

[Ben Sims]

Oh gosh, where do I start.

-Teed off #1 at Pasatiempo with a hybrid and shanked it (how do you shank a hybrid?) into a group on the 9th fairway.  Hits the cart, ricochets and squares a dude in the ass.  I shot a 52 on the front.

-Played the odds on the tee at Ballyneal #15 that no one had been to a course in Ireland that vaguely (at best) resembled a hole there; trying to sound smart on my first GCA event.  No official word yet if Rupert has renamed the hole, "Dell".

-Spry 26-year-old wrenches back on the 4th hole of Top 10-type club with noted architect watching.  Relegated to walking the course and shotgunning said architect with annoying questions.  

-On same day, put foot in mouth on 18th fairway when calling noted book about building a golf resort, "a puff piece".  Once again, trying to sound thoughtful backfires.

-After being introduced on the first tee of a George Thomas Jr. course as "Captain", entire tee area and practice green focus in as I slice off drive into the unused fairway adjacent.

-Showed up (accidentally) early to a tee time at Olympic Lake.  Figured I would wait in the bar.  I ordered a martini and started to drink it as the tender asked my member number.  I just told him who my host was and he let me slide.  My host at least thought it was funny.

These events were all in 2009 alone.  2010 was better for me. If any of you remember the sitcom, "Life Goes On" and you read this stories, you start to understand why my callsign is Corky.  

[Britt Rife]

While mine does not involve Jack Nicklaus (and those two above that do belong in the Golf Embarrassment Hall of Fame), it does involve the venue of his first major--Oakmont.

I counted myself extraordinarily lucky to manage a weekend at that venerable club--I was the "eighth man" in a two-foresome group.  I knew the host member only by vaguely knowing an old friend of his.  So I was simply filler.  Completely dispensible.  The forgotten (and forgettable) man in the group.

The member and his group teed off ahead of us in our second round.  After they hit their approaches to the first green, I teed off with a crummy skied drive.  I was miles and miles from the green for my approach.  As you might know, the first green is hidden from the fairway (especially where I was), as it is over a crest.  A directional pole stands behind the green.

My playing partners hit decent drives, so in order to keep up with them, I eschewed the idea of laying up for position, and instead decided to hit everything I had.  The result was tremendous.  A hybrid shot that took off like an F16, flying directly at the directional pole.  I received many compliments on the walk up the fairway.

Upon reaching the crest, I saw that the green was populated.  My draw dropped.  I had hit into my host.  The man whom I owed this magnificent opportunity to play one of the world's finest courses.  The fellow who graciously allowed me, a stranger, to join him and his party in a weekend lodging on the club's own grounds.

"That came in pretty hot" was all he said.  Of course, I apologized over and over, with hat in hand. 

With that turmoil behind me, and the host's group on to the next tee, I chipped in for birdie.

[Mike Hendren]

My only hole in one happened years ago when my playing partner in a two-man scramble insisted that we sand bag in the qualifying round as we were getting "too hot."  He insists I hit an 8-iron to the back right of the green.  I hit a fat pull that bounces once into the jar at the green's front left.  Needless to say he left me  hanging on the high five.

Adam Clayman has actually seen a shot I have pulled off three times:  hitting the ball backward without it hitting anything.  I get so steep that I drive the ball into the ground and it bounces back a foot or so.  Don't try this at home.

Best one I've seen from another player:  His drive goes between his legs and lodges under one of those stick type tee markets with nails on each end.  He has no idea where the ball went and is looking down the fairway.

Best one Dad told me about:  At our home course there are probably 10 trees, two of which flank the front of the first tee box. Older member hits one and the ball richochets back right in front of the bar's picture window.  He walks back for his next shot, then gets a hitch in his back during the backswing and has to be taken to the hospital.

[John Kavanaugh]

These events were all in 2009 alone.  2010 was better for me. If any of you remember the sitcom, "Life Goes On" and you read this stories, you start to understand why my callsign is Corky.
  

This is a perfect time for me to say how embarrassed I am that I once thought "retard" jokes were funny.  Damn it Huckaby, I am sincerely sorry. 

[JR Potts]

I have mine.

On the 7th hole of Pine Valley, I hit my 3-wood in "the shit" for the 3rd consecutive hole.  I was walking up the fairway talking to my host with my 3-wood in my hand and kind of kidding, kind of angry took the 3-Wood and bent it with the head and the grip with my hands like McGwire used to do with a baseball bat.

As we were talking, the shaft just snapped in half and I stood on the 7th fairway at Pine Valley with a 3-wood in half.....mortified/sad/embarassed.

Luckily, my host started laughing so hard that he had to wait to hit his next shot.

That really sucked.

[Rob Bice]

I don't remember ever being embarassed by a shot I hit on the golf course.  Furious, yes.  ROTFLOL dying of laughter, yes.  Embarassed, no.

I know I am crossing discussion threads, but I just realized I am a dinosaur.  I had to use google to find out what "ROTFLOL" means.  Mind you, the term was used by Shivas...

[Rick Shefchik]

First partnership event with Rick Shefchik.

First hole.

17th tee, for shotgun.

Creek about eight yards in front of tee.

Splash.

Here's the bottom line on all these embarrassment stories: I'd completely forgotten the above incident. What is excruciating to us is a matter of almost no consequence to anyone else.

Here's mine: I was maybe 14 or 15, playing by myself at my home club in the early evening. On the ninth hole, a long, dogleg par 5, I crushed a drive and nailed a three-wood second shot that left me just a couple of feet from the green. They were two great shots; in all the years since, I've never reached that green in two. As I walked to the green, I noticed that there was a man hitting practice chip shots to the green. As I got closer, I recognized him to be one of the club's two best players, a frequent club champion and invitational winner, about my father's age.

"Those were two pretty good hits," he said to me as he scraped his balls off the green and waited for me to play out the hole. I couldn't have been more proud of myself. I then proceeded to chunk my chip and three-putt for a bogey. I'm sure the club champ forgot about it before I was out of sight, but I felt so ashamed of myself that I've never forgotten it. Fortunately, there's a lesson in there about false pride...

[Dan Kelly]

Fortunately, there's a lesson in there about false pride...

Unfortunately, it's a lesson we never really learn -- at least as golfers!

All of our pride, as golfers, is false pride -- isn't it?

[Rick Shefchik]

Fortunately, there's a lesson in there about false pride...

Unfortunately, it's a lesson we never really learn -- at least as golfers!

All of our pride, as golfers, is false pride -- isn't it?

I guess it would take a certain amount of false pride to answer that question (emoticon omitted out of courtesy).

[Dan Kelly]

Fortunately, there's a lesson in there about false pride...

Unfortunately, it's a lesson we never really learn -- at least as golfers!

All of our pride, as golfers, is false pride -- isn't it?

I guess it would take a certain amount of false pride to answer that question (emoticon omitted out of courtesy).

It took a certain amount of false pride to pose it -- how much, it's not for me to say (emoticon omitted out of false pride).

[Ben Sims]

These events were all in 2009 alone.  2010 was better for me. If any of you remember the sitcom, "Life Goes On" and you read this stories, you start to understand why my callsign is Corky.
 

This is a perfect time for me to say how embarrassed I am that I once thought "retard" jokes were funny.  Damn it Huckaby, I am sincerely sorry. 

John,

I didn't pick the callsign, it was given to me.  The explanation of it had as much to do with how lovable I am as well as my occasionally erratic behavior, according to my squadron-mates. 

Thanks for the comment. 

Ben

[Bruce Katona]

Playing with my Uncle (who taught me to play the game) in an outing as a teenanger. This was an outing, and we were enjoying the day, uncle more so as he was on his 5th or 6th adult beverage at that point.  I'm driving the cart....cart goes left, uncle goes right and right out of the golf cart onto the soft grass fairway.....a classic moment.

[Joe Bausch]

Playing with my Uncle (who taught me to play the game) in an outing as a teenanger. This was an outing, and we were enjoying the day, uncle more so as he was on his 5th or 6th adult beverage at that point.  I'm driving the cart....cart goes left, uncle goes right and right out of the golf cart onto the soft grass fairway.....a classic moment.

Was anything spilled?! 

[Dave Falkner]

First time at NGLA 

get on the first tee stripe one out into the bay for a warm up  feeling good  despite the fact i cant breath

my turn comes to tee off and I pull it left so badly I am in front of the fountain

 when I got to my ball  I considered just  keep going right to my car

some how managed to get the clubface on the ball and make par

[Bruce Katona]

Joe: Narry a drop.....beer was in the drink holder, thank heavens !

[Matthew Petersen]

I was a decent but not spectacular golfer in my first couple years of high school; I played on the golf team but not as a part of the top varsity group. The summer prior to my junior year, however, I improved greatly and played well enough at tryouts to earn a spot on the varsity roster. This earned a lot askew glances from the kids who were seniors and had watched my poor play for two years.

Our first tournament of the year was a friendly match against another local high school at the muni we both used as our home course. Playing even better than I had throughout that summer, I fired a great round--and the low round of the day! I felt very full of myself and was also enjoying the stunned looks of my own teammates when the score was posted. Then, as it turned out, the cumulative scores for the schools were tied.

It was only a friendly match, but since we had daylight left, the coaches agreed we'd take the two low scorers from each team and have a playoff, starting at the first hole.

Now, the first hole at this course was my absolute nemesis. Long and tight with out of bounds all the way down the left 9and my miss has always been a quick snap hook). I'd started my round earlier that day with a rare routine par that was really a huge part of what inspired my confidence for the whole round.

As the low scorer, I had the honor on the first tee. With both coaches and all members of both teams gathered around watching, I promptly bombed a drive down the left side and out of bounds. I swallowed my pride and tried to think that I could still save a 6 and we could have a chance in this playoff. I re-teed ... and hit another quick hook, out of bounds.

Then my third try, fifth stroke, found the wrong side of the boundary line as well.

How I even managed to take the club back for my seventh stroke, I'll never know. But that drive, somehow, I actually coaxed right down the middle, then stuck my next shot on the green and made the putt for what has to be one of the greatest 9s ever recorded in competition.

[Keith Buntrock]

Playing in a college tournament last Spring at Purgatory near Indy, I played with a kid, a freshman I think, who hit it in the bunker underneath the lip on the par 3 12th. Totally plugged lie. The kid had no stance and all he could do was hack it back down to the bottom of the bunker and try to make bogey. After the kid does just that, he has a burst of frustration and says, "This is why we should play rake and place in the bunkers!" That wasn't a typo... this is a college golfer.

I gave him a "Seriously??" kind of look and was embarrassed for him.

[Joe Grasty]

Unlike most of you, I didn't take up the game until well into my 40s.  About a year after my first lesson, I'm walking up to the #1 tee on North Texas Golf, a 9-hole pitch-and-putt course.  There's a man, who is not playing, with his two young sons on the tee, one boy is about 8 or 9 and the other about 6.  I'm playing alone and the man suggests I play the first hole with his kids and then I can play through.  The hole is about 130 yds long and there are two sets of tees.  From the front tee, the 9-year-old hits his wood about 10 ft off the ground but right onto the green short of the hole.  The 6 year old hits his ball straight but well short of the green.  I get on the back tee and I'm thinking, "Let's show the kids what a real golf shot looks like."  I proceed to hit a towering slice well right of the green, but more or less pin high.  Meanwhile, the 6-year-old hits his second onto the green.  I take out my wedge and proceed to lay sod over the ball.  My third was pretty good, though.

The 9-year-old proceeds to hole his 30 ft putt for birdie, and the 6-year-old drains his 10 footer for par.  I miss my short putt and tap in for double.

It's a cruel game.

[Sam Morrow]

Unlike most of you, I didn't take up the game until well into my 40s.  About a year after my first lesson, I'm walking up to the #1 tee on North Texas Golf, a 9-hole pitch-and-putt course.  There's a man, who is not playing, with his two young sons on the tee, one boy is about 8 or 9 and the other about 6.  I'm playing alone and the man suggests I play the first hole with his kids and then I can play through.  The hole is about 130 yds long and there are two sets of tees.  From the front tee, the 9-year-old hits his wood about 10 ft off the ground but right onto the green short of the hole.  The 6 year old hits his ball straight but well short of the green.  I get on the back tee and I'm thinking, "Let's show the kids what a real golf shot looks like."  I proceed to hit a towering slice well right of the green, but more or less pin high.  Meanwhile, the 6-year-old hits his second onto the green.  I take out my wedge and proceed to lay sod over the ball.  My third was pretty good, though.

The 9-year-old proceeds to hole his 30 ft putt for birdie, and the 6-year-old drains his 10 footer for par.  I miss my short putt and tap in for double.

It's a cruel game.

Is this the place off of NW Highway, I think it's on Walnut Hill?

[Tom ORourke]

I was witness to a friend of mine pull a classic or two. One was the ninth hole at Eagle Lodge near Philly. Par 3, downhill over water, 175 yards. He had only played golf for a few years. Plus, there were 2 white teeing areas. The tee that day was actually at the 135 area, not the 175. Way downhill. He looked at the card, wanted to make sure he got over the water, so he smoothed a 3 iron. From 135. We were on the green and had waved them up. The ball did clear the water. And the green. It landed in the parking lot and bounced over the club house. I told him I wanted to see his next shot as it was still in bounds. He just picked up. That same year I played him in our work league. I hit the fairway on a dog leg par 5. He tried to draw the tee shot and pulled it OB. He then blocked the next one, hit a tree around 20 yards from the tee and the ball bounced back past him into the woods behind the tee. He figured teeing off with his fifth shot was not worth it so he conceded the hole.

[David Whitmer]

I have another one from the Columbus area. One day I'm up there playing OSU Scarlet in the morning, then The Lakes in the afternoon. At The Lakes, the first tee is practically attached to the putting green. My group is teeing off, and there must be 30 guys hanging around the area. Down the left side of the first hole is a row of houses. Well, in my quest to show everybody how far I could hit the ball, I got quick at the top, hit a dead pull, and I nailed the very first house. I wanted to get out of the area immediately.

The more embarrassing part is this: fast forward about 5 or 6 years from that, and the club where I was the pro was hosting the Ohio Senior Amateur. One morning I was in a cart around the clubhouse, and spotted a guy about to walk to the driving range. I asked him if he would like a ride, and he accepted. On the way to the driving range, I asked where he plays his golf, and he said The Lakes in Columbus. I said do I have a funny story for you...first house on the left...I hit it unbelievably hard...yada yada yada. His response? "That's my house."

Thankfully he laughed about it and said don't worry, it gets hit all the time.

[Anthony Gray]

  I was making out with this wemon infront of the mens locker room when her husband walked out.Very uncomfortable.

  Anthony

[Stan Dodd]

Anthony,
Shouldn't this be posted on the "Every Club has a Rodney Dangerfield"?

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