Embarrassing Golf Moments

[DMoriarty]

Along the lines of Joe Bausch's tale,  I once drove a ball into an occupied hotel hot tub after having it crack off of the redwood deck a few times.   But that was nothing compared to this embarrassing moment that was cga.com related.  

My group was teeing off at the famous first hole of a certain Main Line Philadelphia club - I won't name names, but I will say that CBM and HJW were responsible for determining its original layout - when an obviously flustered assistant professional came running out to the tee with a note in hand and a very annoyed and vexed look on his face.  Imagine my embarrassment when he asked whether one of us was a Mr. Moriarty.  

It turns out certain famously pompous cga.com poster had called the club and was insisting that I return from the first tee to the pro shop so he could speak to me immediately on the telephone before we played.  Apparently, the rest of the group was supposed to stand there mouths open until after he had had his word with me.  Needless to say I was more than a little embarrassed by the interruption, and rather than returning to the pro shop, I apologized to my group for the interruption and preceded to dribble my drive of the tee.   (Admittedly there was a good chance that this would have happened regardless.)

[Gary Daughters]

When I was 12/13 I volunteered as a standard bearer at the Atlanta Golf Classic.  I got to carry around a score sign attached to a long pole.  My group consisted of Gay Brewer, Forrest Fezler and Dick Lotz.  On the 18th hole a gust of wind blew up, caught my sign and swept me into a pond.  Dick Lotz was nice enough to give me his Amana hat, which I managed to get autographed by Jack Nicklaus and Angelo Argea.  I wear it every now and then and it's almost indescribably geeky.

[Rory Connaughton]

Cory

Fast play and the Thorn are mutually exclusive!

[Jeff_Brauer]

David,

We would all be interested in descriptions of those who occupied the hot tub!  And, how you managed to retrieve the ball.....

I trust that famous gca.com guy was none other than....the pizza guy?  Delivering you a low cost delicious lunch so you could avoid paying the outrageous guest and meals fees at said club?

[Bill_McBride]

David,

We would all be interested in descriptions of those who occupied the hot tub!  And, how you managed to retrieve the ball.....

Stroke and distance?

[John Kavanaugh]

Along the lines of Joe Bausch's tale,  I once drove a ball into an occupied hotel hot tub after having it crack off of the redwood deck a few times.   But that was nothing compared to this embarrassing moment that was cga.com related.  

My group was teeing off at the famous first hole of a certain Main Line Philadelphia club - I won't name names, but I will say that CBM and HJW were responsible for determining its original layout - when an obviously flustered assistant professional came running out to the tee with a note in hand and a very annoyed and vexed look on his face.  Imagine my embarrassment when he asked whether one of us was a Mr. Moriarty.  

It turns out certain famously pompous cga.com poster had called the club and was insisting that I return from the first tee to the pro shop so he could speak to me immediately on the telephone before we played.  Apparently, the rest of the group was supposed to stand there mouths open until after he had had his word with me.  Needless to say I was more than a little embarrassed by the interruption, and rather than returning to the pro shop, I apologized to my group for the interruption and preceded to dribble my drive of the tee.   (Admittedly there was a good chance that this would have happened regardless.)

David,

Great story.  That reminds me of the time on the second hole of my home course I received a call from a legendary exGCA poster accusing me of sabotaging his very own architectural discussion site.  It was the first time my golfing buddies had ever seen me genuinely angry and because it scared them they felt like I needed consoling, like good friends would.  I can not explain my embarrassment when, because I was still angry, I told them the full story in boring detail.  I lost a friendship that day, and only through the understanding of my playing companions, it was thankfully the one conceived through some evil mixture of access and paranoia.

[Jeff_Brauer]

Bill,

Playing a Stonebridge Ranch, a Pete Dye course with the typical 18th as a cape hole, with a client who had hit every water hazard that day, we made a bet his ball would stay dry on 18.  He aimed so far right that he found a neighboring swimming pool.  While he declared victory in the bet, I was able to word parse my way out of it by pointing out his exact bet was that his ball would stay dry, not find a water hazard......

[Joel_Stewart]

So many.

A few years ago I hosted a guy I have known for 45 years at Cypress Point.  He was also my best man at my wedding.  He played to about a 12 handicap so he wasn't bad.  In his lifetime, he had only played a few private courses and never had a caddie.

On the 1st hole that day, he was really nervous.  There was probably about 30 people milling around the 1st hole.  As you may know, the 1st at CPC has a hedge about 50 yards off the tee which guards the road which is the 17 mile drive.   He hits his tee shot and it doesn't even make it to the hedge.  Quite a bit of laughter.

    

[Carl Rogers]

In about the 5th grade, I did knock out a neighbors picture window.

But that is a right of passage .... more than an embarrassment ...right?

[Bill_McBride]

Bill,

Playing a Stonebridge Ranch, a Pete Dye course with the typical 18th as a cape hole, with a client who had hit every water hazard that day, we made a bet his ball would stay dry on 18.  He aimed so far right that he found a neighboring swimming pool.  While he declared victory in the bet, I was able to word parse my way out of it by pointing out his exact bet was that his ball would stay dry, not find a water hazard......

Well done.  We call our buddy who hit six water hazards in one round at our club "Aqua Man!"

[Jason Walker]

Not my most embarrasing moment but a good follow-on to the swimming pool story.  I was playing in the Golf Club of Georgia's Member/Guest a few years back and we arrived to the tee of the par 3 13th on Lakeside.  Big group there for beat the pro, hole in one, hit the green, etc.  The other guest in our group stands on the tee--and the guy is playing well and carries a 6 or 7 handicap--and just blows it way right out over the lake, just an awful shot for a this guy.  If you've seen the hole you'll remember a huge stucco house with an enormous pool deck, all probably 75-100 yards right of the flag.  Little do we know there's a number of people hanging out there and they don't hear our faint cries of "FORE"--plus it was hard to gauge the distance and we really didn't think the ball would carry.  Lo and behold, the ball bangs around the pool area and the five or six people there scatter like scared birds!

[Matthew Rose]

As a sophomore in high school, I finally got promoted to the junior varsity and got to travel for the first time. I played Cherokee CC in Madison which is where Stricker's in-laws (the Tizianis) all hang out. I was playing against one of them in a match against Madison East High School. I wasn't an outstanding player then but I usually shot in the high 80s/low 90s. I was also kind of an arrogant little snot who thought I was something special and had made a point prior to my promotion that I kind of "deserved it".

My coach came out to watch me play the 8th hole, a 200 yard par-3 over a lake. I hit three balls in the water, knocked my 7th shot on the green and two-putted for a 9. I played the rest of the round with a massive migraine headache and shot 116. That is at least 20 strokes higher than any other score I've ever posted in a tournament, except for when I was maybe 9 or 10 years old.

I got dropped back to the underclass squad and was notably embarrassed. But I did get the chance make my way back into JV later and played varsity as a junior and senior. I also got another crack at Cherokee the next year and shot 81. 35 strokes better. I haven't played it again since then. I'm not sure I ever had a more satisfying round of golf than that one.

Runners up: Hitting a wrong ball in a major high school event and doing my best imitation of TC Chen while playing in a best-ball team event with my brother last year.

[Dan Kelly]

Jeff --

One word: Chipmunk.

Yrs.,
Dan

[Dan Kelly]

A few more words:

1. Drive hits round-ball-type tee marker just ahead.

Rifles right back past our heads.

OB.

2. First partnership event with Rick Shefchik.

First hole.

17th tee, for shotgun.

Creek about eight yards in front of tee.

Splash.

[Dan Kelly]

On the first hole of an early morning round with a regular group, I make a snotty remark about a playing partner's shirt.

He replies "At least I am not wearing two belts."

Perfect for Peter Pallotta's tucked-in sweaters!

[Chris Johnston]

More than a decade ago, I teed of a well known US Open venue with the greatest leap in technology, a "Power Pod". 

My buddies still cry laughing...

[RJ_Daley]

I've been trying to think of what would be an embarrassing golf moment.  I am afraid that I must have had so many, none of them actually stand out for me to remember.  Or worse, that every person here on gca.com that has played a round or few with me, can remember what should be my most embarrassing moment, but are just too kind to remind me... 

[Colin Macqueen]

Gentlemen,
This is a bit long-winded but bear with me.  The Australia National University soccer club would, at the end of each season, have a golf day. This day out was held at Yass Golf Club, a short, typically outback course in country New South Wales. The bar-man, who doubled as the starter, in typical Aussie fashion never let a Scotsman forget that the Scot had an accent, or speech impediment as he described it. A fair few played golf but very few knew the rules thank goodness. Anyway as I was an avid golfer there was unwarranted expectation amongst the soccer fraternity that I could hit a golf ball in the intended direction. On the first tee the club house, very old with a corrugated iron roof, was off to the right with a basic changing room and shower facility below. My tee shot was a shocker. It ballooned off to the right, struck the tin roof where it bounced around noisily attracting the attention of the barman/starter inside the club. From there it came to ground and ricocheted off a retaining wall into the changing room. Mirth was evident on the tee. I trudged across to retrieve my ball only to find it lying in the goddamned urinal!!!!!  The barman/starter lived off this story for years but at least no-one tried to pin a 2-stroke penalty on me for hitting a ball in(to) motion!

Cheers Colin

[Garland Bayley]

Played my first GCA outing with Peter Pittock, Jim Adkisson, Mike Erdmann, and John Kirk walking along to keep us company. I told them I would meet them on the range and would be wearing a yellow shirt. When they found me they told me I should have told them I was left-handed. Apparently they think every Tom, Dick and Harry wears yellow shirts. Anyway, I got to the first tee and barely made contact with the ball, popping it up short left. The third baseman could easily have retired me. Meanwhile Erdmann is birdieing the first hole and I am bringing up the rear. Probably by now, I have related my lack of talents enough that I would be expected to pop up the first drive, but no one knew me back then. I managed to get some game together on the back nine and birdied two holes coming in. So you mix in a couple of birdies with a few snowmen, and I shot a very average score for me, 95.

[Jeff_Brauer]

Dan Kelly,

I still swear it was a suicidal chipmunk!

Another swimming pool story from me, this time when I was about 15. I had just got my second set of clubs McGregror MT Tourneys.  I was in the back yard practice swinging before a round with Dad, when the 5 wood slipped out of my hands and helicoptered over the tree line. 

I went to the next block, poking over the fences to see which back yard it had landed in.  On the third house down, I saw it in the swimming pool.  As I opened the gate, and ran to fish it out, only then did I realize that there was a pool party going on.  I can only imagine what those folks thought of golf clubs raining down from the sky!

[Ian Andrew]

In a committee meeting at one of the clubs I work with I had a pretty heated debate about some restorative work with a new green’s chair who was more into modernization. He went out to play, with the other committee members while I worked on the course for the morning making notes. When I was done I decided to play a few quick holes before heading home. I was working on a problem I had with blocking the ball wildly left. Things went well till my tee ball on the third hole soared well left off the tee and over the trees. I yelled fore just in case. I was not heard and it turned out it hit a player on the adjacent hole. It was the new green’s chair. He was lying on the ground as I approached moaning. I was aghast until they all started laughing. Turns out it was on one bounce and the others recognized me coming through the trees and thought it would be funny.

On the same note, I got hit on the course a few years back. It was after an interview at a club out west and while playing with the interviewing committee. I was hit by a ricochet off a tree by one of the committee members. I deadpanned, “I guess I just got the work.”

[Jim Johnson]

Years ago, my wife and I were paired up with an older couple from Pennsylvania at the original 18 at Banff Springs. For those that recall, that first teebox lay just below the clubhouse patio. The tee markers that day were well back on the long teebox. Having just been paired up with this couple mere minutes before, and about to hit our opening teeshots in front of a busload or two of Japanese tourists who were quietly watching from the patio above, my wife and I nervously approached the teebox. The other gentleman offered to let me have the honour, so I teed up the ball hesitantly between the markers, waggled the driver a couple of times, and proceeded to take a mighty swing and topped the ball. With copious amounts of overspin, it rolled about 20 yards forward, coming to rest at the front part of the teebox.

The (polite) whispering from above was deafening.

[David_Elvins]

The only time I can remember being really embarrassed on the golf course was the time my Dad told me that he wouldn't play with me if I carried on with that behaviour. 

Not as amusing as most stories in this thread...

[Dan Herrmann]

Years ago I'm working at Nike.  I helped run a Nike golf league on Wednesdays after work at Forest Hills golf course (William P. Bell).

It's a sporty little public course without much in the way of changing facilities.  So one Wednesday after work I get to the parking lot and switch from my jeans (it was Nike, after all) into my shorts, which were really more like tennis shorts.  Need to do this in my car - space is tight and my tee time is quickly approaching.

Time passes and I'm on the 6th tee with two good friends.  Bit of a wait.  All of a sudden, my friend Dan Croft starts laughing at me pretty loudly.  Turns out in my haste and desire for privacy that I had put on my shorts backwards.  

They were still busting me on it 10 years later.

Pretty funny!

[Richard Muldoon]

Years ago when I was a young lad I caddied for my Dad in the Club’s foursomes final. This was a traditional old fashioned club.
It was a 36 hole final and lunch would be had between rounds, so Dad gave me a jacket, white shirt and tie just in case (unlikely he thought) that I would dine with the players.
In those days club finals were big events and were watched by about 30 people including the President, Secretary and Captain.
Any way 1st round completed, in for lunch and not only am I dining with the players but I’m on the main table with said dignitaries.
The 1st course duly arrives, tomato soup, and I eagerly lean forward to begin and my tie goes straight into the soup.
Thinking no will notice if I remove the tie quickly, so I grab it and pull it back.
Unfortunately the tie has sufficient time to soak up enough soup to splat across most of the front of my nice clean borrowed white shirt.
This is quickly followed by the sound of my Dad whispering in my ear
‘Do your bloody jacket up’