[JC Jones]

JC Jones,

Upon what fact do you base your accusation against Matt Leinart? Did he take money? Any facts you would like to present?

Or are you a closet Bruin with penis envy taking pot shots?

Before you fill your moat, raise the gates and call the battering ram I suggest you disembark from your carousel ride long enough to shake your self from the odious anal secretions and gather your sea legs.  This way you can recognize patent facetiousness and unbunch that lacy purple number you pass off as undergarments.

And for the record, try having the red head classify you as euphausiid like for over a decade and then you can walk a day in my shoes.  When you do, you will recognize that envy is not nearly strong enough a word to characterize your emotions.

[Greg Tallman]

Gib - when you say "taklking in tongues" are you referring to something other than normal conversation with the good doctor?

[Melvyn Morrow]

Talking in Tongues..... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UqXHbPeJciI

Nyvlem

[Don_Mahaffey]

Gib,
Leinart chooses to sign with the Texans, primarily because of Kubiak's history of developing pro QBs, you call it a backwater and then attack all Texans?

Typical SC.

[Steve Lang]

 8)shill shrill krill

 

[Gib_Papazian]

Don,

When you find something of merit in Houston aside from Original Ninfa's, please let us California idiots know and we will be on the next airplane to investigate.

My impression of the place after five days was that of a bug infested steam bath, populated by ignorant rednecks and frightened homosexuals who could not afford the rent in Atlanta.

In case you had not noticed, every woman in your overgrown Hickville is a blond until you pull down their K-Mart panties, padded bras, pink pumps and weekly visit to the tanning salon in a desperate attempt to land an assistant cashier at the waffle house on a fast track to district manager.

The fog is rolling gently over the bluffs above the Golden Gate and it is time to share a slice of raspberry cheesecake with the redhead before retiring to our suburban enclave.

Call us when the temperature and humidity levels drop to levels appropriate for someone aside from mad dogs and Englishmen.  

[Steve Lang]

  SHRILLER.. that krill is awfully small bait

Gib, if all you could savor in Houston in 5 days here was the original Ninfa's, then that is truly sad.

p.s. it will be ~ 93°F/72°F today in Houston area, probably a little cooler 3 hrs down in the Coastal burb where Don is..

[Don_Mahaffey]

Don,

When you find something of merit in Houston aside from Original Ninfa's, please let us California idiots know and we will be on the next airplane to investigate.

My impression of the place after five days was that of a bug infested steam bath, populated by ignorant rednecks and frightened homosexuals who could not afford the rent in Atlanta.

In case you had not noticed, every woman in your overgrown Hickville is a blond until you pull down their K-Mart panties.  Padded bras, pink pumps and a weekly visit to the tanning salon in a desperate attempt to land an assistant manager at the waffle house on a fast track to district manager.

The fog is rolling gently over the bluffs above the Golden Gate and it is time to share a slice of raspberry cheesecake with the redhead before retiring to our suburban enclave.

Call us when the temperature and humidity levels drop to levels appropriate for someone aside from mad dogs and Englishmen.  

Poor Leinart, where’s he going to find talent to share the hot tub with? Those Rice girls get into school for reasons other than who their daddy is and they’re probably more interested in spending time in the library then with a has been. But, if he trolls down by UH he can probably find someone with a beer bong to share.

[Pete Lavallee]

Texas has been producing the very best quarterbacks in the country for the past 8 years or so.

The Mannings, Rivers, Rothlisburger and Brady are all from Texas huh; the things you learn on GCA!

[JC Jones]

Texas has been producing the very best quarterbacks in the country for the past 8 years or so.

The Mannings, Rivers, Rothlisburger and Brady are from Texas huh; the things you learn on GCA!

Of the quarterbacks starting in the NFL this week, 2 are from Texas.

[Garland Bayley]

...
My impression of the place after five days was that of a bug infested steam bath, populated by ... frightened homosexuals who could not afford the rent in Atlanta.
...

Where did you say you were from Gib? Oh I remember now, San Francisco. You must have felt right at home.

[Gib_Papazian]

JC Jones,

Upon what fact do you base your accusation against Matt Leinart? Did he take money? Any facts you would like to present?

Or are you a closet Bruin with penis envy taking pot shots?

Before you fill your moat, raise the gates and call the battering ram I suggest you disembark from your carousel ride long enough to shake your self from the odious anal secretions and gather your sea legs.  This way you can recognize patent facetiousness and unbunch that lacy purple number you pass off as undergarments.

And for the record, try having the red head classify you as euphausiid like for over a decade and then you can walk a day in my shoes.  When you do, you will recognize that envy is not nearly strong enough a word to characterize your emotions.

JC,

As Truman Capote once famously remarked, there is a great difference between *writing* and *typing.* Stringing together a series of words chosen randomly from a thesaurus does not qualify as a cogent response.

What "red head" are you referring to? What does classifying you as a small oceanic invertebrate have to do with collegiate football? When confronted with convoluted, tortured prose, I usually suggest the student try reading their writings aloud. Some people have difficulty making sense when editing from a purely visual perspective.  You will "hear" yourself when speaking the words on the page and more easily catch grammatical mistakes. Auditory learners (sometimes) eventually learn to literally speak the words as they compose.

Grade: D-

Now, go sharpen your crayon and try again.

      

[RJ_Daley]

Poor Anthony, got left standing in Gib's kitchen in his surgical gown, while speaking in tongues and tasting the curry and garlic-balsamic offerings.

I hope Dr Gray is getting better (I didn't catch the thread on his upcoming fusion).

Now, you egg head writer's can get back to the delicious battle of college team all star put down artists.   

[Gib_Papazian]

Garland,

Please tell me that you do not actually take my high-handed riffing seriously. The problem is that in the "good old days," before we opened the Treehouse hatch and invited rabble into our grillroom, most of us knew each other by phone or golf - or in my case, a revolving door of house guests who were only too happy to fetch the fixin's and vino from the grocery store for some home cooking at Casa de Armenian.

Now, I hardly know most of these guys and am so busy between running a business, trying to cure autism, helping my parents and dealing with an ongoing lawsuit that I have little time to post anything. Now and again, I'll crack my knuckles and let a little something rip, but keep forgetting that the tone of this corner of cyberspace has become deadly serious.

Ironically, the first step down the glacier was wrought by a couple of old timers - both of whom are terrific guys - who argued about Merion for so long they began to hate each other. To be honest, it turned me off to the entire game of ping pong because at the end of the day, our endless discussions on a arcane subject like golf architecture *really* provides a (very) loose framework for a bunch of guys to tickle each other's brains.

Maybe that is not what Ran intended, but just like a bunch of nerds in the bird watching society, its more about the camaraderie between like minded nutcakes . . . .

For the record, I was not terribly impressed by Houston, but my close friend Eric went over to Champions recently and spent over an hour talking to American golf's greatest sage. So he loves Houston . . . . I spent the week having my ear bent at the Houston Convention Center; my bemused remarks about K-Mart panties and bleach jobs was meant to be taken with the levity in which it was intended.

The only women I saw that week were hired eye candy at the Produce Marketing booths and overweight wives from Cleveland, noshing on whatever free samples being passed out while their polyester shirted husbands pretended to be important buyers.

To make matters worse, a hurricane was headed straight for Houston the day we were supposed to leave and for all intents and purposes, both airports were shut down. Believe it or not, we rented a car and dashed all the way to Dallas, one step ahead of the weather and dove onto a plane just before they suspended flights at DFW.

Ninfa's was awesome though - I have to admit. Even better than the food in San Antonio - which is one of my favorite cities on the planet. And Texas produces an unbelievable amount of great golfers and football stars - even more than Southern California. And yes, Texas chicks are ridiculously hot. Okay?

So, I am raising the white flag.

But the story about Anthony is 100% true. I swear it.

[JC Jones]

JC,

As Truman Capote once famously remarked, there is a great difference between *writing* and *typing.* Stringing together a series of words chosen randomly from a thesaurus does not qualify as a cogent response.

What "red head" are you referring to? What does classifying you as a small oceanic invertebrate have to do with collegiate football? When confronted with convoluted, tortured prose, I usually suggest the student try reading their writings aloud. Some people have difficulty making sense when editing from a purely visual perspective.  You will "hear" yourself when speaking the words on the page and more easily catch grammatical mistakes. Auditory learners sometimes eventually learn to literally speak the words as they compose.

Grade: D-

Now, go sharpen your crayon and try again.

Gib,

I am warmed by your willingness to engage someone so unworthy of your attention.  Especially given your postulated position of expertise.  Perhaps one day, if you teach me master, people will fawn over my piecemeal analogies and playful mix of seriousness and vulgarity and say my typing has elevated to Papazian-esque writing.

In the interim, I'll have to make follow up explanations of my posts so those with lower than a 5th grade reading comprehension will be able to understand what I am saying.  Here is my post to you:

Before you get all defensive, pull yourself away from the skunk you are on (the ones with the odious anal secretions) and try to recognize OBVIOUS sarcasm so you don't get your panties in a bunch.

My penis envy has nothing to do with my collegiate affiliations.

None of the above has anything to with, nor was it intended to have anything to do with, college football (if that wasn't ridiculously obvious the first go around).

[Gib_Papazian]

JC,

My "lacy purple undergarments" are actually Cardinal and Gold.

If you really want to know.

And your prose is still prosaic.

You need to learn the difference between intentionally obtuse (Barny) and unintentionally stupid.

Maybe a different color crayon?


 

[JC Jones]

JC,

My "lacy purple undergarments" are actually Cardinal and Gold.

If you really want to know.

And your prose is still prosaic.

You need to learn the difference between intentionally obtuse (Barny) and unintentionally stupid.

Maybe a different color crayon?

I'll keep my prose prosaic and my poetry poetic, thank you.

You need to learn the difference between obvious and obscure.

[Gib_Papazian]

I read it over (once again) and have finally figured out the source of the confusion: The English department at Michigan State evidently does not teach punctuation.

e.e. cummings also had an elastic interpretation of the rules of grammar, so your brilliant musings might just be too far over my head to fully digest. Sadly, great writers like you are too often misunderstood.

[Peter Pallotta]

JC, Gib - I'm enjoying the banter. You are worthy adversaries, like in Shane when he meets Jack Wilson. ("So you're Jack Wilson."  'What's that mean to you, Shane?"  "I've heard about you" "What have you heard, Shane?" "I've heard that you're a low-down Yankee liar" "Huh. Prove it".   Bang. Bang. "Was that Wilson, Shane?" "That was Wilson alright - he was fast, fast on the draw")  Sure, a little hit and miss from both sides, but a man's reach should exceed his grasp once in a while, otherwise you get pablum. Plus, you're both very smart fellows.

Peter
An example of typing....  

[JMEvensky]

JC, Gib - I'm enjoying the banter. You are worthy adversaries, like in Shane when he meets Jack Wilson. ("So you're Jack Wilson."  'What's that mean to you, Shane?"  "I've heard about you" "What have you heard, Shane?" "I've heard that you're a low-down Yankee liar" "Huh. Prove it".   Bang. Bang. "Was that Wilson, Shane?" "That was Wilson alright - he was fast, fast on the draw")  Sure, a little hit and miss from both sides, but a man's reach should exceed his grasp once in a while, otherwise you get pablum. Plus, you're both very smart fellows.

Peter
An example of typing....  

PP,I'm not certain that Wilson was a particularly worthy adversary.I've no clue as to who's playing whom in this western.

Gib P,+1 on the original Ninfa's and +1000 on your ability to turn a phrase.

[Peter Pallotta]

JM - well, I'm not sure about that. Jack Palance could be a pretty intimidating fellow, and Shane himself was not looking forward to the encounter. BUT - yes, and as you know, Shane was from some other plane of existence, and no one can out-draw a metaphor.

Peter   

[Jud_T]

I read it over (once again) and have finally figured out the source of the confusion: The English department at Michigan State evidently does not teach punctuation.

Gib,

I knew there was something I liked about you.  I just couldn't put my finger on it till now....

[Ben Sims]

I am warmed by your willingness to engage someone so unworthy of your attention.  

It strikes me as odd to use the word "warm" to explain entertainment, at least ouside of the bunny ranch.  But watching this feud is like watching me talk about constitutional protection with a tree man from Berkeley on the BART.  JC, please continue the mental self-flogging long enough for me to gain even more respect for Gib's writing.  But please don't sell yourself short JC, you're tremendouly worthy of Gib's "target engaged" style.  In fact, I'd say that any 30-day period that involved you trading punches with both Gib and Tom D was a fun one.  For us at least.

[Gib_Papazian]

Ben,

This is just an amusing skirmish between Trojans and Spartans.

We can play at fencing class all day if he likes - and I promise not to bring out the bloody dagger.

The only fight to death I've ever had in the Treehouse was with Wayne Morrison - and believe me, he does not want to f*ck with me again. 

[JC Jones]

Gib,

Is your bloody dagger the 1988 Rose Bowl?

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