As a ludicrously crooked and short-hitting single-digit handicapper, I am always amused by the assumptions involved in a discussion like this.
I average about 205 off the tee while hitting about 7 fairways a round, and carry a 7.something index, based almost entirely on scores at my home course, a Ross that measures 6332 (par 71) from the tees I play.
I will do almost anything to avoid playing a course longer than that when travelling, because it simply isn't any fun.
Hell, my home course isn't a whole lot of fun for me on day like yesterday when there was overnight rain, and long rough with heavy dew. I hit ONE green regulation, and only managed to shoot an 80 because I had 14 one putts.
Given the choice between 5900, and 6500, I go short almost every time.
But I play with a friend whose handicap if close to mine, but his game is the antihesis of mine. He's 70 yards longer off the tee, and a generally good iron player. But while I get better and better as I get closer to the hole, he gets worse. Nothing strikes fear in his heart as much as a 30-yard pitch.
He loves playing 6700- to 6800-yard courses with generous fairways and big greens.
I love playing 6000-yard courses with generous fairways, no forced carries, and little greens.
I know I mentioned it here before, but the only "formula" I have ever seen that makes sense for a significant percentage of golfers is to mutiply your five-iron distance by 36. For me that's 5950, and for my friend it's about 6850, for Tour pros it's about 7400.
Like any "formula," this one has to be applied with caution, because there are so many exceptions, but I still think it's a decnet place to start--f you are looking to have fun on the golf course.
Oh, and one more thing, I am pretty convinced the objections to playing different tees within a group is macho BS. I have played thousands of rounds with the women in my family, and at no time has anyone had a problem with people playing off differeing tees. We even play for money, and it doesn't bother anyone.
If you do play off different tees, it's simple to make the handicap adjustments needed to equalize the game.
But the average make ego won't let him play up when his buddies are on the back tees. I have mostly gotten over it, but it's still there--a least a little bit.
Ken