The Glorious 7th of October. The day each year comes around so slowly yet, it is the only day on the calendar that all serious golf players find it hard to wait for. The anticipation is unbearable for some of the old timers from high in the Glen. Not surprising as it is only open for less than 12 hours and you have to bag what you can in that short timescale.
The super keen ‘Slevins’ have been known to stake out certain courses way before the break of dawn. The important part of the game is not just to bag as many as you can during daylight hours, but to be able to quickly and quietly proceed to other courses. Once satisfied with their tally – which I must say can be rather considerable, these canny old men & a few women disappear into the dusk having already planned their escape bring a close that most new and modern tradition recently introduced into the Highlands.
The Police are always on guard and believe they know the identity of the ring lead, but regrettably no evidence.
So to all I nominate the ‘Slevins’ on that most precious of days The Glorious 7th October.
Oh nearly forgot, you, I expect will like to know how to play. Well it is not clay pigeon shooting on carts, however the shooting of the Carts themselves. As each herds clears the first Tee, normally lead by the Matriarch, very little is undertaken until they disperse to their various positions, generally a straggler is quickly spotted and is picked off by the well-aimed shot. However, once the Carts suspicions have been raised, their game improves and start grouping, making it difficult to execute with extreme prejudice any lone Cart.
Once the word is out that the ‘Slevins’ are on the course, they tend to make a hasty retreat to another nearby free ranging Carting course, whilst keeping a close eye on the time.
Some of the most professionals and successful Slevins have the walls of their homes covered with the front screens and wheels of these ubiquities monsters. Police have announced that they expect a breakthrough anytime as they are following leads and seeking builders who specialise in reinforcing gable walls in the old crofts. They hope to break the news after the 7th of October this year that they have broken the largest Cart culling ring in the history of Scotland. However, from a reliable source apparently close to the Slevins, it appears that they may be changing tack and prefer electronic aids as apparently they can mount them on their walls without the need of builders. On hearing this unsettling news the Police are somewhat at a loss as to what to do, if these electronic devices are the new targets of these wild Highland folk.
If you feel you are being stalked, that someone is eyeing up your Pathfinder instead of your wife, then you are advised to note the description of said individual and report your suspicions to the Police.
Finally, reports have been made that the Police do not expect this variation of the game to be exported to The Americas. If it does, it will decimate their game leaving many stranded and lost throughout their courses.
So beware the 7th of October and the Glorious Slevins, they may be in your neighbourhood soon – God help you.
From a ‘Lucky Number Slevin’ Member