Thinking too hard can put you off your putt

[TEPaul]

What did you just say Bar-keep? Did you say these guys are too immature and that must mean they are underaged and too young to drink the hard and good stuff? That's nonsense! Nay, it's more like nigh onto BULLSHIT.

Set up a large bathtub of bourbon right here and right now!! And I want all these little munchkins on here to get in it and splash around and do not even think about getting out until all the bourbon is gone. If they want to put their little toy duckees and dogs in the tub too and drink the bourbon I'm totally cool with that too!

What's that Bar-keep? Did you ask me if I want a cold bathtub of bourbon or a hot bathtub of bourbon?

Now you're talkin'! Start the tab and don't stop it until I tell you to!

[PThomas]

my preference of the hard stuff, Mr.Paul, is a good gin...however, during these cold winter months some whisky - no ice please - does warm one quite well...

now where to find a good bathtub....

[Lloyd_Cole]

How on earth can a guy like Lloyd Cole get sucked into a thread like this one and get criticized for anything he said? I've met Lloyd and my take on him is he's one of the most leveled headed and reasonable people on just about everything and every subject I've ever seen on here.

Tom, shucks..

But I'm not entirely new to this form of combat. I wish I was. I've had a couple of run ins with our pal Pat M, but only when he pulls the  'you just don't get it' card. I call BS on that tactic in an argument. Melvyn has been, knowingly or unknowingly, up to that sort of thing for quite a while now. The quote which I initially entered this debate responding to - "The article was a serious topic and worth looking into. As for my comment re aids it was tongue in cheek which went over the heads of must but not all." - was quite heinous in it's condescension.  Pat is clearly a great guy, and for all I know MM might be also, but as Bob Dylan said, when asked about the vitriol in his songs that was directed at his friends and acquaintances he said (paraphrased) - "I think it's my duty to needle them". I'm not  being flip when I say that I do sort of feel that way here. We have a great forum. It needs protecting from without and from within.

[TEPaul]

Lloyd:

Neither you nor anyone else on here really needs to have any run-ins with Patrick Mucci. First of all, Pat is a great guy---not on here but in person. And second, he really isn't anything more on here than my foil to keep things edgy and interesting. Everything Patrick knows about architecture he learned from me anyway!

[Bill_McBride]

Although I haven't met him in person, I know from personal experience that Melvyn is a true gent.  We had planned to meet in Tain during my trip to Scotland (Dornoch-St Andrews) last June.  When it turned out Melvyn couldn't make it, he telephoned the Glenmorangie distillery in Tain and purchased a bottle of G. Nectar to be held for my pickup.  This was a real act of generosity since it really wasn't owed.

Once we got to the Buda Cup at Lundin, I brought the bottle of whiskey to a gathering and we all drank a wee dram to Old Tom in Melvyn's honor.  Great stuff!

I think it would be great if MM could come to America and just have a sample of our style of golf.  There are many purists here but golf has diverted some from the original model.  We still have fun and we still love our golf.  At times Melvyn seems hung up on the difference, so it would good if he could share some of our golf with some of our GCA lads and lassies.

[TEPaul]

"now where to find a good bathtub....  "

My Dear Dyslexic name:

Forgettaboutit, you let me worry about the bathtub in the saloon thing. My experience has been the best bathtubs in the saloon are in the first or second best bedrooms on the second floor of the saloon. When one needs a good bathtub for bourbon or gin or whatever they are generally occupied by one of the saloon's premier hookers, but again, you just let me worry about that. If the participants of this thread get too immature and too contentious with one another I may just bring the bathtub down from the second floor with the hooker in it. Even the finest and hottest hooker is worth some bourbon displacement or whatever when our little munchkins get in it in the roiling saloon area.

Listen, Paul Thomas, have you ever tried to teach a Dodge City hooker how to putt? Well, I have and thinking too hard over a putt has never presented a problem, that's for sure!

[PThomas]

"now where to find a good bathtub....  "

My Dear Dyslexic name:

Forgettaboutit, you let me worry about the bathtub in the saloon thing. My experience has been the best bathtubs in the saloon are in the first or second best bedrooms on the second floor of the saloon. When one needs a good bathtub for bourbon or gin or whatever they are generally occupied by one of the saloon's premier hookers, but again, you just let me worry about that. If the participants of this thread get too immature and too contentious with one another I may just bring the bathtub down from the second floor with the hooker in it. Even the finest and hottest hooker is worth some bourbon displacement or whatever when our little munchkins get in it in the roiling saloon area.

Listen, Paul Thomas, have you ever tried to teach a Dodge City hooker how to putt? Well, I have and thinking too hard over a putt has never presented a problem, that's for sure!

My confusedly named friend:

I absolutely agree about the bathtub with the aforementioned occupant!

Such a situation might make up for my bachelor party (true story): i got drunk and passed out even BEFORE the stripper came!

and since i have never taught one of our bathtub friends how to putt, I will leave that to your experienced hands !

[TEPaul]

"I got drunk and passed out even BEFORE the stripper came!"


ouououch, not a good progression of events at all; not in the slightest.

[Anthony Gray]

"This sad little lizard told me that he was a brontosaurus on his mother's side. I did not laugh; people who boast of ancestry often have little else to sustain them."

-- Heinlein

  Jon,

  Please post more. Without the royal blood Melvn Morrow is still a golf historian. After one of my first posts about my passion for Cruden Bay, Melvyn IMed me a note with seven attatchments. Photos and articles about the courses' history. Being new to the site I did not know that he was the great grandchild of Old Tom. I thought this gentleman is a golf historian that has an awesome library.

   Others,

  I thought golf was great because it brings people together.

  Some may not "give a rats ass about Old Tom" but most in the golfing community acknowledge his place. His face on the R&A, and the pilgramage to his grave in the old grey towne are memorable moments in a golfers life.

  All that being said Melvyn has never said there is only one way, but maintains strongly a better way. And let me also say and I would love to personally witness Melvyn experience the pure exhileration of taking a buggy airbourne over an artifical mound at my home course. Keep the faith. He will come.

  Regards,

  Anthony

[Tom Huckaby]

Great stuff toward the end of this thread.

But the funniest part of all has to be YOU TOM PAUL counseling anyone about opprobrium.   That had me dying... but yes, as only Nixon could go to China, I guess only Tom could most get one to see the silliness of all of this.

And pretty silly it was.  Melvyn and I have made our peace off-line.

TH

[Melvyn Morrow]

Anthony

Many thanks for the support and words, but I regret there is no royal blood, although I remember my father saying that one of the Hunters was the product of some out of marriage relationship with some member of some distant house or seat (Earldom). Royal blood no, but I expect the word some call me may refer to the child that follows out of wedlock all those centuries ago.

I’m not certain I wish to fly off an artificial mound (anywhere) and certainly not on a cart, its not the taking off that worries me but the landing - possibly on “Punji Spikes” donated by my many well wishers.

As for being a golfing historian I again cannot take credit for that. I just researching courses connected with Old Tom and am happy to share what I find with most people. With you interest in Cruden I thought you would like to see the articles and maps.

Melvyn

[PCCraig]

I still think Old Tom fluffed his lies and Young Tom used a rangefinder. 

[Anthony Gray]

  All is well in the world of GCA. I think I'll take a nap.


  Anthony

[Bill_McBride]

  All is well in the world of GCA. I think I'll take a nap.


  Anthony

Keeping the peace is exhausting work.   

[Tom Huckaby]

And of course it never ends.  Anthony, you're needed to deal with Pat Mucci.

 

[Bill_McBride]

And of course it never ends.  Anthony, you're needed to deal with Pat Mucci.

 

.....and whatever happened to Nacarrato and Flemma?  Oh, right.

[TEPaul]

"I still think Old Tom fluffed his lies and Young Tom used a rangefinder.    "


Pat Craig:

I'm afraid you're right about that. Both Young and Old Tom probably did that and worse or would've done it if they had the chance. The truth is they just didn't have modern technology available to them most of their careers but that certainly doesn't mean they wouldn't have used it all if it had been.

I think Melvyn is as great guy and he certainly is very passionate about purity in golf and the purity of Old Tom's outlook on things but come on, Melvyn is telling us we shouldn't believe our own eyes!?

Just like I did, I'm sure you saw how John Cleese in that Titleist ad caught Old Tom on tape using NXTs the new ultra distance ball!

How in the Hell can Melvyn explain that away? Most of the world of golf saw it. That would hold up in any court of law in the world. There he was----Old Tom---his very own self, CAUGHT ON TAPE using the latest technology. That is uncontrovertible PROOF and no one can deny it!

I don't know about you but I don't call stuff like that purism in golf! And with architecture and Old Tom, personally I think if he ever had the chance to see Tom Fazio's Shadow Creek, a perfect recreation of North Carolina or Oregon or whatever the Hell it's supposed to be, in the hot dry desert of Nevada he would think he really was in architectural Heaven!

[RJ_Daley]

I don't know what Melvyn looks like, but if he is the striking picture of a Scotsman I think he is, they ought to consider Melvyn to take Cleese's spot in the Titleist commercials.  I'd pay admission to see that!  Melvyn could write his own scripts, or just recopy some of his essay's on GCA.com. 

[PCCraig]

"I still think Old Tom fluffed his lies and Young Tom used a rangefinder.    "


Pat Craig:

I'm afraid you're right about that. Both Young and Old Tom probably did that and worse or would've done it if they had the chance. The truth is they just didn't have modern technology available to them most of their careers but that certainly doesn't mean they wouldn't have used it all if it had been.

I think Melvyn is as great guy and he certainly is very passionate about purity in golf and the purity of Old Tom's outlook on things but come on, Melvyn is telling us we shouldn't believe our own eyes!?

Just like I did, I'm sure you saw how John Cleese in that Titleist ad caught Old Tom on tape using NXTs the new ultra distance ball!

How in the Hell can Melvyn explain that away? Most of the world of golf saw it. That would hold up in any court of law in the world. There he was----Old Tom---his very own self, CAUGHT ON TAPE using the latest technology. That is uncontrovertible PROOF and no one can deny it!

I don't know about you but I don't call stuff like that purism in golf! And with architecture and Old Tom, personally I think if he ever had the chance to see Tom Fazio's Shadow Creek, a perfect recreation of North Carolina or Oregon or whatever the Hell it's supposed to be, in the hot dry desert of Nevada he would think he really was in architectural Heaven!

Tom-

The point I was trying to make is that starting threads with almost the sole purpose of prodding another DG member into a response (like Melvyn did in his first post) is dumb and petty. It is something that is constantly going on in this board and is the reason many great contributors to GCA.com have left the board. Of all the great contributors on this site it stinks to see Tom H. get all upset over some Scotsman’s tired and boring opinions. The fact that he hides behind the fact that his "great-great-great-great" grandfather Tom Morris as some sort of way to connect himself with his ideal of "pure" golf and to sheald himself from criticism is irritating to me. Going back to the whole Tom Morris fluffs his lies (insert 1,000 wink-faces) was to show Melvyn that it stinks being prodded in the public discussion board and that not everyone really cares who he is related to.

What doesn't help the matter is when our token Scotsman sends 3 e-mails trying to flex his GCA muscles from 3000 miles away. So yes Tom, I really did think that Old Tom stared in the golf ball commercial and I laugh at everything Gary McCord says on air.

I'm all for GCA.com and "O/T" topics because at the end of the day we are really just doing the same thing we would be if sitting at the local 19th hole. If people literally can not take a joke or have any semblance of respect for others opinions there is a slight problem. That being said if Melvyn suddenly decides to see other "land" and arrives tonight at O'Hare, I would be the first person to buy him a drink and a steak.

[Anthony Gray]

  Pat,

  He'll take a Tanqueray and a Tab.

  Anthony

[Kalen Braley]

Pat,

I've been here since Melyvn 1st joined GCA.com and while I agree some of his posts can be less than desireable, Melyvn has made many many fine posts to this board and in personal emails. I don't think your last post was fair to him at all.

The fact of the matter is, he is Old Toms relative and he does have a lot to add to the discussion board and posts like this are not conducive to moving forward in the best direction.  He has I'm sure a wealth of information and insight into several key founding members of the game that would be hugely beneficial and wonderful to this site.

This thread has gone on long enough... everyone has made thier peace, so lets bury the hatchet.

[Bill_McBride]

Melvyn is also one of the most generous members of GCA.com.  On several occasions I have mentioned something in a post - best recent example Elie Golf Club - and very shortly I get an email from him with attachments of early plans, photos, articles on Elie.  Melvyn is a font of knowledge on all things about golf in the Kingdom.

Just don't get him started on golf carts and rangefinders.

Although he might not enjoy walking 18 holes in Pensacola in August any more than I would........I don't think you ever get that weather in the UK.

[Anthony Gray]

  Melvyn,

  I hope you enjoyed these kind comments above from your fellow GCAers. I was completely blown away at your comments on the thread "Who introduced you to the game". At that time I did not know your heritage. To be taken to the R&A on your first day as a golfer I just do not have the adjectives to describe my thoughts.
 Thinking about that story got me to look up the photo from my first day as a golfer here in the states and my first day introduction to this wonderful game.





















   

  My life has never been the same.

   Anthony

[John Burzynski]

I will put in one vote for Melvyn's helpfulness.

I too had a question or two a while back about Scottish courses and TOC, and I received probably 20 attachments via email and more information and help than I ever asked for or thought I'd get.  I have since had one or two email correspondences with him and again have gotten lots of great pics and such.  He is genuinely concerned in preserving as much history and tradition of the game and of his family...maybe overboard on occasion but mostly at heart out of a genuine concern for the game. 

I kind of lay in the background on these discussions, often finding here and elsewhere that people type things that they would never say to each other face-to-face.  It is the nature of all discussion boards. 

I do have one key question for Melvyn...are you golfing in the new fallen snow?  If that is not enough for you I can send you about 12" more from my front yard.  I see on the news that they closed all schools in Scotland/England area due to 3" of snow.  Around here that is not even an excuse to be 5 minutes late to work.

[Tom Huckaby]

I'll be happy to put in good words for Melvyn as well... he has also sent me many articles and the like of interest.  He is a fount of historical information.  As I have said many times in this thread (and elsewhere), he does have many great contributions to offer.

The hatchet is buried regarding the issues that led to the acrimony on this thread.  Here's hoping it can stay buried.

TH