To clarify my post, I was simply trying to share some bag room humor with you guys. Like I said, I do the job once a week so I can practice and play for free. The extra $100 a week or so is a nice date with my wife, or gift for the holidays, etc.
The place I work at is a daily fee course with no members. One of the things that needs to be stressed to some of you that don't like it when a kid comes over to your clubs and starts cleaning them without asking you first is this... for example, where I work, it is MANDATORY for you to service the guest unless the guest tells you to stop. It is part of the customer service protocol. I agree the job doesn't take much skill and I think the minimum wage is fine for the employer to pay the outside guys at. I know that the service my crew gives is WAY above what you usually get and that is why we are one of the highest tipped, daily fee course outside service staffs in the desert, if not the highest. We are more like concierges. We recommend restaurants, other courses, spas, etc. when asked. We valet cars, we shuttle people back and forth from their timeshares, we clean their clubs, we prepare people's travel bags and get their gear loaded up and flight ready, etc. It's not like four guys with "dirty towels", with tattoos and earrings ravenously waiting for fresh meat.
To be honest, I could care less if I get tipped. I simply like helping people coming in and going out when I am there and I'm genuinely interested in their experience at the course. Maybe it's all the years I was a club pro that make me that way. I think the need for outside services and their customer service level should depend on the type of course and its particular culture. There is no need for over the top help at munis and small private clubs. Resorts, big daily fee courses, and big time private clubs seem to have a clientele that demands excellent customer service.
I think no-tipping clubs are fine but I think the hourly pay should go up to incentivize employees to service the guest. You will get what you pay for as both an employer and a patron. I think most no-tipping clubs do pay more per hour and I think that works out fine in most cases.
Let me debunk what I consider to be a myth that has been mentioned on this thread... outside service employees will NOT make more money if they ask people if they can help them. Where I work, if that happens it is 3 to 1 that people deny the help. If you are proactive and start to help them they usually appreciate it and tip accordingly. I know there are some that are put off by that but in my experience they are a vast minority. It's simple, if you don't want help just politely let the outside service staff member know that you don't need the help and that'll be the end of it. You might feel uncomfortable when a kid approaches your bag without asking but how do you think that kid feels when he is expected to go help a guy that is giving him a look of disdain and general annoyance that he is coming over to help? There is nothing more awkward than a guest that gives you that look like, "I really don't want your help because I think you are just trying to squeeze me out of $5". The truth is, that in most cases these kids' jobs rely upon the fact that they MUST try to help you or face potential termination.
Anyway, my original post was to share some things I find to be funny. No one is hurt when they don't get tipped. We simply have some funny sayings and names for things to pass the day. No one goes home thinking, "I can't believe that guy gave me the stiff arm. I'll never forget him. Matter of fact, I'm gonna write a book about how cheap he is."
As for change/coin tips... sorry, one thing any person working for tips can't stand is change. The worst tip I ever got was from Bob Hope. I gave him a pass because he wasn't all there upstairs and was in his late 80's and starting to lose his faculties. I was 19 or 20 years old and parking cars while going to school. I brought his car up for his driver who had gone in with him to a function. I opened Mr. Hope's door escorted him around the car and he looked me right in the face and said, "Live the dream", and handed me $0.36. I have never laughed so hard in my life. I still have the change. Come to think of it, that may have been the best tip I ever got in more than one way.
Jeff F.