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Mark Manuel

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Assigned a fourth by the pro shop horror story...
« on: February 19, 2008, 06:13:22 PM »
Sitting in the Jacksonville airport, using the free wifi which is great, and couldn't let this one go.  On a quick weekend with my parents and we played in Brunswick today on Oak Grove Island.  We were assigned a fourth by the pro shop.  Normally this is never a problem and I have met some great people and players this way.  On the 12th hole my Mom turned to me and said "this is the worst guy I have ever played with."  He never stopped talking, never.  Ran through a dozen balls and looked for everyone regardless of how lost they were.  When he had a putt on the same line he would stand four feet behind your ball while you putted so that he "got the benefit of your good putt."  He was full of swing tips even though he was on his way to something in the 140 range.  I could type another 150 lines about the things this guy did.  If you are ever in Brunswick and are assigned a guy named Barry from Ontario I highly recommend running the other way or going to the beach for the day.

But all this got me wondering, anyone else have an experience like this one?
The golf ball is like a woman, you have to talk it on the off chance it might listen.

Kalen Braley

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Re: Assigned a fourth by the pro shop horror story...
« Reply #1 on: February 19, 2008, 06:17:33 PM »
Mark,

There are some funny stories in this GCA thread from last summer...good stuff.

http://golfclubatlas.com/forum/index.php/topic,30764.0.html

JESII

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Re: Assigned a fourth by the pro shop horror story...
« Reply #2 on: February 19, 2008, 06:21:37 PM »
Would that be...Ontario, Georgia?

For some reason that was the funniest part of the story to me...

Mark Manuel

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Re: Assigned a fourth by the pro shop horror story...
« Reply #3 on: February 19, 2008, 06:27:24 PM »
See, that made me laugh.  No the accent was definitely Canadian.  It made me think of South Park: Bigger Longer and Uncut.
The golf ball is like a woman, you have to talk it on the off chance it might listen.

Kalen Braley

  • Karma: +0/-0
Re: Assigned a fourth by the pro shop horror story...
« Reply #4 on: February 19, 2008, 06:29:45 PM »
Sounds like a clear case of oral diaharrea to me....

I'm not even going to touch "Bigger, Longer, and Uncut"...talk about your way too easy setups.

Melvyn Morrow

Re: Assigned a fourth by the pro shop horror story...
« Reply #5 on: February 19, 2008, 06:50:50 PM »
Hi Mark

Seems that you remember me from Brunswick, my name is Barry
Well, I enjoyed myself. Sorry to hear you did not.




No, only kidding - just having a laugh at your expense. Never played at Brunswick.  Will loose myself on the beach at St Andrews if someone says his name is Barry.

Mike_Young

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Re: Assigned a fourth by the pro shop horror story...
« Reply #6 on: February 19, 2008, 08:27:08 PM »
Mark,
Was the course doing ok?  We designed that course in 1990 and have not heard much from it since.....had some nice views.
Mike
"just standing on a corner in Winslow Arizona"

Gerry B

Re: Assigned a fourth by the pro shop horror story...
« Reply #7 on: February 19, 2008, 09:05:57 PM »
 we have all had horror stories.

One that comes to mind happened in south florida once. Introduced ourselves (we were a 2 ball) and the guy said his name was joe. we asked where he was from - he responded from California - we asked where in California? He replied California. The guy was a complete asshole for lack of a better description.

Now the fun starts - if you look up the word karma in the dictionary - a photo of what comes next would be in plain view.

He was driving his cart - and around the 12th hole he was driving too fast around a corner, lost control  and dumped it into the adjacent pond. I have never laughed so hard in my entire life as the course ranger was heaping verbal abuse on him and telling him he was going to have to pay for the cart damage.

Our parting comment to him was - Joe, is that your putter floating by in the pond?

David Neveux

Re: Assigned a fourth by the pro shop horror story...
« Reply #8 on: February 20, 2008, 12:45:55 AM »
Got paired with a guy at Whistling Straits (Irish) and his buddy two summers ago.  This guy was the biggest joke i have ever seen.  My buddy and I were playing a match for money but that was the only game going.  This guy was the biggest cheat, he would hit it a mile into the junk, take off in a half jog and would easily locate his ball everytime.  By the time we were done, he had shot a 74 or something like that, more like an 94.  He was fist pumping every 3 footer he made like tiger after he broke the scoring record at Augusta.  On and on he went, about how great he was, how expensive his "custom" shaft was.  He claimed he had the longest 3 iron in the state, and was in shock when i knocked it by him.  Brian (my buddy) who is a shorter hitter, flushed a nice drive at one point and hit it by this guy.  As Brian walked by him, he looks at him and say, "I didn't even catch mine."  What a dick.  We still mimic him today, what a character.  Even his buddy (who was a great guy) hated this prick, "I can't believe I play golf with this guy, if it wasn't for......)  It was really a sight to see, who cheats when they aren't even playing for money / against someone.  I wish I could remember more. 

I also played with a friends Cousin once at "The Bear" in Traverse City.  He played golf for TCU in his day and had a real chip on his shoulder.  First tee, (he's playing the tips) he bombs one, splits the fairway, 300 plus and we're all "nice shot, great shot."  His response, "No it wasn't, I've been drinking all day."  Thanks Captain America, what a shame he only played nine holes.  "100 bucks a hole, i'll play from back here."  After the first hole, o.k. you owe me 100.  It was hard telling my good friend that his cousin (who he loved like a god) was maybe responsible for the only time I've had absolutely zero fun on a golf course.

David_Elvins

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Re: Assigned a fourth by the pro shop horror story...
« Reply #9 on: February 20, 2008, 01:51:05 AM »
I have never despised anyone I played with but one did leave me slightly bewildered.

We were assigned a 4th in a corporate ambrose day.  On the 2nd tee he was telling us all about how he hadn't bought a packet of tees in 5 years.  On the 3rd tee he revealed how he takes broken tees home and reconditions a new point on them.  On the 4th tee he interrupted a converstation midstram with the statement "Why are we wasting time  talking when we could be looking for tees?" before crawling off the front of the tee box. 
Ask not what GolfClubAtlas can do for you; ask what you can do for GolfClubAtlas.

Joe Hancock

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Re: Assigned a fourth by the pro shop horror story...
« Reply #10 on: February 20, 2008, 06:36:16 AM »
I have never despised anyone I played with but one did leave me slightly bewildered.

We were assigned a 4th in a corporate ambrose day.  On the 2nd tee he was telling us all about how he hadn't bought a packet of tees in 5 years.  On the 3rd tee he revealed how he takes broken tees home and reconditions a new point on them.  On the 4th tee he interrupted a converstation midstram with the statement "Why are we wasting time  talking when we could be looking for tees?" before crawling off the front of the tee box. 

Beautiful....absolutely beautiful! A fellow teesmith who is also a recovery specialist!

 ;D
" What the hell is the point of architecture and excellence in design if a "clever" set up trumps it all?" Peter Pallotta, June 21, 2016

"People aren't picking a side of the fairway off a tee because of a randomly internally contoured green ."  jeffwarne, February 24, 2017

Voytek Wilczak

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Re: Assigned a fourth by the pro shop horror story...
« Reply #11 on: February 20, 2008, 07:42:38 AM »
An amateur psychiatrist in me says that mending and repainting broken tees is not a bad obsession.  ;D

There are worse, much worse.

Lucky for me, pretty much all the folks I got paired with (and I used to play a LOT as a walk-on single) were nice people.

I hope I was nice people, too.

CJ Carder

  • Karma: +0/-0
Re: Assigned a fourth by the pro shop horror story...
« Reply #12 on: February 20, 2008, 08:23:01 AM »
My dad and I were assigned another twosome one day at our course.  Show up on the first tee and find out it's another father/son twosome so we think it might be fun.  Then we notice, kid (20 something) is wearing wrestling shoes, dad's wearing cowboy boots with the belt buckle to match and they're playing out of one bag!!!! 

Nevermind that the stupid starter didn't do anything to stop them, but they then decide to play the blue tees (next to back) with us, despite our insistence that they might have more fun playing from the whites or even the reds.  The dreaded "nah, we have to get our money's worth!" arrives and we're stuck with them playing from 6600+ tees.  3 holes and 1 h 10 minutes later, we come to find out that this it the kid's first time playing golf and only the dad's 2nd or 3rd.  Dad insists that the kid learn to play "for business reasons" and so that's why they're out there forking out $100+ each and playing what might be the slowest round on record.

Our pro comes along after 4 or 5 holes and looks at us like "WTF is going on?"  He quickly understands that they're slowing things down and asks them to hold up while he lets a couple other groups play there.  We went ahead as just as twosome and ultimately finished 8 holes ahead of them (i.e. we putted out on 18 and they were just coming off the 10th green!).

Never forget it.  But alas, I think everyone who belongs to some sort of club has these kinds of stories.  It's impossible to play golf without having at least a few run-ins.  On the whole, the experiences have been more good than bad, and they provide a lot of laughs and memories.

Robert Kimball

  • Karma: +0/-0
Re: Assigned a fourth by the pro shop horror story...
« Reply #13 on: February 20, 2008, 10:10:25 AM »
I can't remember off the top of my head who posted it or when it was -- but there is a great story of a guy who played Pebble Beach and got paired with someone who brought along his pet white rabbit for the whole round!!
He even took along a video camera to document "fluffy's big day." One of the most surreal stories I have read.

HamiltonBHearst

Re: Assigned a fourth by the pro shop horror story...
« Reply #14 on: February 20, 2008, 10:34:01 AM »



CJ Carder says:
"Never forget it.  But alas, I think everyone who belongs to some sort of club has these kinds of stories.  It's impossible to play golf without having at least a few run-ins."

No CJ, that is why I belong to the clubs I belong to. :D

Craig Sweet

  • Karma: +0/-0
Re: Assigned a fourth by the pro shop horror story...
« Reply #15 on: February 20, 2008, 10:49:02 AM »
I got partnered up with a grandfather and his two grand kids....the grandfather could play, sort of, but the grand kids were total beginners....I left them after the second hole and saw them again while playing up 18...they were on 9....but the absolute worst was when the starter sent my buddy and me out with this chubby 15 year old....the son of a local biker guy....we played at our normal speed and he played at his speed, and on every hole we were on the green waiting for him to arrive...usually he would pick his ball up and run to the green to join us....throw his ball on the green and proceed to knock a 12 foot putt 20 ft past the hole...he'd do this on nearly every hole...smiling broadly all the time....after a few holes his big burly, bearded father comes roaring up in cart and has a few words with him and them comes over and says in a lowered voice, "thanks for playing with shit head...you have way more patience than I do....I owe ya big time, big time, man".....

Sadly, the kids father was killed in a biking accident about a month later....
Project 2025....All bow down to our new authoritarian government.

Kalen Braley

  • Karma: +0/-0
Re: Assigned a fourth by the pro shop horror story...
« Reply #16 on: February 20, 2008, 11:00:59 AM »
I was playing a 9 holer in NorCal years ago, and thankfully it was only just 9 holes.

Before we even teed off, this guy started rambling about how good he was, how he almost shot under par a few times, played in all these tournies all over the state.

On the first hole, puts one in the rough, reaches down with his club and gives himself a preferred lie... ::).  Doesn't stop there.  On the first couple of holes, the gimmies were 2-3 feet, by the end of the round its 5-8 foot gimmies.  And this whole time just keeps jawing about his awesome skills and how if he started playing sooner he coulda played on Tour, yada, yada, yada.  So after 9 holes of mulligans, preferred lies, and gimmies, I was just done.

And to boot, he was like Jay Leno and had his sidekick there for moral support to agree with everthing he said, laugh at his jokes, as well as "give" him all those gimmies.

tlavin

Re: Assigned a fourth by the pro shop horror story...
« Reply #17 on: February 20, 2008, 12:24:14 PM »
I got stuck with a guy at Pebble Beach who rented a cart and had his girlfriend drive him around.  He might have shot 160.  She kept barking instruction from the cart across the fairway: "R.J. keep your head down".  One of the worst rounds ever.

Evan Fleisher

  • Karma: +0/-0
Re: Assigned a fourth by the pro shop horror story...
« Reply #18 on: February 20, 2008, 12:41:06 PM »
I can't remember off the top of my head who posted it or when it was -- but there is a great story of a guy who played Pebble Beach and got paired with someone who brought along his pet white rabbit for the whole round!!
He even took along a video camera to document "fluffy's big day." One of the most surreal stories I have read.

Ask and 'ye shall receive...

http://golfclubatlas.com/forum/index.php/topic,18015.0.html
Born Rochester, MN. Grew up Miami, FL. Live Cleveland, OH. Handicap 13.2. Have 26 & 23 year old girls and wife of 29 years. I'm a Senior Supply Chain Business Analyst for Vitamix. Diehard walker, but tolerate cart riders! Love to travel, always have my sticks with me. Mollydooker for life!

Kalen Braley

  • Karma: +0/-0
Re: Assigned a fourth by the pro shop horror story...
« Reply #19 on: February 20, 2008, 12:59:41 PM »
I can't remember off the top of my head who posted it or when it was -- but there is a great story of a guy who played Pebble Beach and got paired with someone who brought along his pet white rabbit for the whole round!!
He even took along a video camera to document "fluffy's big day." One of the most surreal stories I have read.

Ask and 'ye shall receive...

http://golfclubatlas.com/forum/index.php/topic,18015.0.html


Evan,

Thanks for that one, that has got to be the best all-time GCA threads I've ever read....just unbeleivble.

TEPaul

Re: Assigned a fourth by the pro shop horror story...
« Reply #20 on: February 20, 2008, 01:13:18 PM »
"......anyone else have an experience like this one?"


Yes, just once and believe it or not it was in local US Amateur qualifying at HVGC.  It took us about one hole to realize this guy should not have been there. I think he shot well over 110 that morning. It wasn't just that he was terrible he had his whole family and a bunch of friends there cheering on all his 117 strokes. I think we tried to get the tournament committee to just take him off the course realizing he's slipped through the handicap limitation somehow but they wouldn't do that and they let him finish the first round before telling him he couldn't go on. But the amazing thing to me is Buddy Marucci was in that group and he was actually the guy's marker. Marucci seems to never let anything get to him and the most impressive thing was he was actually the medalist that day even with all that first round distraction.

Jason Hines

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Re: Assigned a fourth by the pro shop horror story...
« Reply #21 on: February 20, 2008, 01:39:50 PM »
Thanks for the bunny story, everyone here at the office keeps asking me if I am ok because I was laughing so hard.

Jon Spaulding

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Re: Assigned a fourth by the pro shop horror story...
« Reply #22 on: February 20, 2008, 01:44:35 PM »
The first time I played Pebble I was paired with an "independent" movie producer and his girlfriend who was a part time actress in some of the movies. One can put the balance of the story together but when I saw the subject line of this thread I couldn't help but be reminded of Colonel Kurtz ;).
You'd make a fine little helper. What's your name?

Tom Yost

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Re: Assigned a fourth by the pro shop horror story...
« Reply #23 on: February 20, 2008, 02:01:53 PM »
He mumbled his name on  the first tee - " ill."   I thought he said Bill, my buddy was calling him Phil.  Seemed like an ok guy until he missed a short putt on the 2nd hole where he let out a loud expletive.  Next hole, another missed putt, this time he whacked the ball away with a one-handed swipe that left a scuff on the green.  My buddy and I looked at each other and shrugged.  As the round proceeded, we witnessed more cussing, club throwing and general malcontent than either of us had ever seen.  We stopped talking to him early on and eventually avoided even making eye contact.

On the 18th green, "ill" drops his final putt for a birdie and says  "A great way to end a great day of golf!"

Jeez, buddy... if that was a great day, I would hate to see you on a bad day!!!   :o


Tom

Paul Perrella

  • Karma: +0/-0
Re: Assigned a fourth by the pro shop horror story...
« Reply #24 on: February 20, 2008, 02:40:15 PM »
A friend and I were playing on Maui and we got matched up with a young Japanese couple that had just gotten married. On the first tee we were on the back tees so the young man joined us there. Needless to say he should not have but the fun started when his wife tried to tee off from the ladies tees. She proceeded to wiff about five times (with a black ball) and then waved for us to go ahead and play in front of them. We played out the first hole and went to the second tee. While standing on the second tee and waiting for the fairway to clear I looked over and was shocked to see the couple with their cart up on the green about five feet from the flagstick. Even through the language barrier we explained to them that carts had to be kept on the cart paths and they did that the rest of the round to our relief.