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Jack_Marr

  • Total Karma: 0
John Garrity's "Scientific" Ranking System?
« on: August 05, 2007, 05:20:11 AM »
Does anyone know how this works?

Golf Ranking System
« Last Edit: August 05, 2007, 05:20:52 AM by Jack_Marr »
John Marr(inan)

Jay Flemma

Re:John Garrity's "Scientific" Ranking System?
« Reply #1 on: August 05, 2007, 09:56:46 AM »
No, but I"ll see him in Tulsa next week and I can ask.  You've piqued my interest as well.  I vouch for John.  He's a bright man, an excellent writer and a fine gentleman.

Jim_Kennedy

  • Total Karma: 1
Re:John Garrity's "Scientific" Ranking System?
« Reply #2 on: August 05, 2007, 10:02:13 AM »
Jack,
I would suspect that the only 'system' he has is not very 'scientific', or so he seems to be saying when he wrote:  

"My (John Garrity) Top 50 is above politics, incorruptible, and as close to scientific perfection as chaos theory and a writer's budget will allow. My system utilizes a complex web of informants and busybodies who file detailed reports on everything from flagstick heights to ball-washer detergent quality. This data is augmented by public records and, when necessary, unauthorized credit checks. Then I thoroughly Google the course in question.
Finally, we do the math. I say "we" because the Top 50 employs a secret algorithm developed by professor Charles Eppes at the California Institute of Science. I don't claim to understand how this algorithm works — it covers five blackboards in Charlie's garage — but it took the processing power of a dozen Mac G-5s, working through the night, to produce the final list.
"I never beat a well man in my life" - Harry Vardon

BCrosby

  • Total Karma: 0
Re:John Garrity's "Scientific" Ranking System?
« Reply #3 on: August 05, 2007, 10:33:10 AM »
No less authority than The California Institute of Science!? ;D

Some serious tongue planted in cheek going on here. Or at least I hope there is.

Bob

John_Conley

  • Total Karma: 0
Re:John Garrity's "Scientific" Ranking System?
« Reply #4 on: August 05, 2007, 11:18:34 AM »
Does anyone know how this works?

Golf Ranking System

Must just be some courses he likes.

New Richmond made it.  My dad would be happy.

Jack_Marr

  • Total Karma: 0
Re:John Garrity's "Scientific" Ranking System?
« Reply #5 on: August 05, 2007, 12:43:35 PM »
Jack,
I would suspect that the only 'system' he has is not very 'scientific', or so he seems to be saying when he wrote:  

"My (John Garrity) Top 50 is above politics, incorruptible, and as close to scientific perfection as chaos theory and a writer's budget will allow. My system utilizes a complex web of informants and busybodies who file detailed reports on everything from flagstick heights to ball-washer detergent quality. This data is augmented by public records and, when necessary, unauthorized credit checks. Then I thoroughly Google the course in question.
Finally, we do the math. I say "we" because the Top 50 employs a secret algorithm developed by professor Charles Eppes at the California Institute of Science. I don't claim to understand how this algorithm works — it covers five blackboards in Charlie's garage — but it took the processing power of a dozen Mac G-5s, working through the night, to produce the final list.

Hi Jim

I suspected that, so I used the inverted commas.

It's an interesting list all the same.

John
John Marr(inan)

Forrest Richardson

  • Total Karma: 3
Re:John Garrity's "Scientific" Ranking System?
« Reply #6 on: August 05, 2007, 01:49:21 PM »
John wrote one of the all-time most humorous books on golf courses: America's Worst Golf Courses.

There appear to be some copies available on alibras.com for those of you who have not graced your libraries with this excellent and  irreverent work.

John is obviously paradodying the rating "system"...and it is about time.

— Forrest Richardson, Golf Course Architect/ASGCA
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