Since there will likely never be another thread where this subject will be even remotely within reach, here is a copy of an email my brother sent.
Enjoy!
The Jewish History of Golf
This will serve to set the record straight....
From way back it has long been thought that the game of golf originated
in Scotland in the 15th century. Recently uncovered evidence indicates
that this sport actually began in eastern Europe and for many years was
enjoyed by the Jews of the area. Stories passed down from generation to
generation told of Moses and Aaron and their famous Desert Classic,
which
endured for 40 years. This great tradition was re-born many years later
in the fields and forests of eastern Europe.
A shepherd, Velvel Gross, passed the time by hitting pebbles with his
shepherd's crook. The number of times he hit the stones became known as
Gross Score. He eventually decided to lay out an actual course by
utilizing adjacent farmers' properties. The playing area consisted of 18
segments - the number chosen to represent the Hebrew symbol Chai,
meaning
Life.
The game could then be played by Wednesday golfers as nine holes
(half-Chai), regular golfers as 18 holes (Chai), enthusiasts and
fitness-freaks as 27 holes (Chai-and-a-half), and with the wives during
mixed play (double-Chai). The putting surface was named after Moishe
Green, because the shortest grass was found on his property.
The search for durable projectiles (which could sustain repeated strikes
with wooden sticks) led to the Rebbetzin's kitchen, where her dimpled
matzo balls were the clear-cut winners. They came in 90 or 100
compression and were vigorously tested by a mechanical arm called Iron
Myron. Parva, or Par, meaning neither here nor there, was the number of
shots allocated to each hole. Faivel the Sissy scored the first recorded
Birdie, as onlookers shouted, "Not bad for a Faygelah!" The Eagle was so
named for Adler the Shtarker, who scored the first amazing
two-under-par!
Soon courses sprang up all over the land with such exotic names as
Knobble Beach , Grieven Valley , Seder Brook and the two richest clubs:
Chelm Ridge and Chai Ridge. This particular group was known as The
Haymishe Five. Membership in these clubs provided many diverse
activities. Tournaments such as Blintzis and Schnapps and Beat the Tsar
(which was a shotgun) were organized.
A committee of men was responsible for the many rules and regulations
that all were required to observe. Men's and women's facilities were
strictly segregated according to Jewish law. A dress code was rigidly
enforced, in spite of the women's insistence on the right to bare arms.
Shortly thereafter, the top golfers in the land emerged and formed the
PGA...Polish Galitzianer Association.
And that, boys and girls, is the story of how the Jews invented golf!