James,
That is more of an indictment upon them and their sad lack of ingenuity and imagination, not too mention skill and intelligence.
If you miss the first green, depending upon the flag location, you have numerous options - a bump and run into the bank, a pitch, or you could try pitching into the side of the hill and letting the ball roll across, but that requires all of the above qualities, which are clearly sadly lacking in the populace of Melbourne, apart from one or two enlightened individuals of course.
Ditto with three. A miss short can be a putt, a chip or a pitch into the side of the hill. A miss long can be a putt or a chip around the banks.
A miss long at eight can be a putt certainly - but a chip and run is a perfectly reasonable proposition, and so to is the pitch. I don't see why a putter is the choice if you miss short on eight, but then I have clearly been gifted with qualities others lack, so such mundane options aren't attractive.
Same with nine - a miss short can be a pitch or a bump into the bank. I fail to see how the putter could be an option for anyone other than a zombie, or a US Presidential candidate. Miss left, and the putter is a more attractive option - but a chip into the bank or a little pitch, or even a flop could also be used.