Mike,
I think that society at large is progressively becoming less civil. There is nothing wrong with stating opinions, and better yet, backing them up with facts and arguments. But even when trying to be funny or provocative, calling people names and ascribing dark motives to them is OB.
Bob,
That's a difficult distinction, and a harder discipline.
I once had the dual responsibility for overseeing the management and sales of a large apartment complex in Texas. A mid-level employee of the client performed a surprise audit and his report was less than favorable (he fiiguratively tried to tear me a new one). The primary issue was that we had billed for 50 new HVAC units, but his count showed only 33. Unfortunately, this rather uniformed layman failed to realize that some units were roof mounted and out of sight, while others were on concrete pads at grade level.
To make a long story short, I responded to the critical report with polaroids of each unit, and suggested that had the man gotten out of his air-conditioned car on a beautiful summer day in Texas, that perhaps his count and the report might have been more accurate.
Shortly after, I heard from tha client that this chap meant no harm, that he was only criticizing the asset and not the asset manager. To which I felt like saying, please! An inanimate object has no responsibility (unless it is an SUV). Over time one either develops thick skin or another great defense mechanism: blinders to unwarranted criticism from people who don't matter.