It's all about pedigree. I don't think the club makes the man but certainly the members make the club.
This is an interesting topic for me. Let's see if I make sense talking about it.
Since I've been a member of GCA, I have joined a couple golf clubs as a national member. I went shopping for the clubs that suited me best. I don't think that's how it works at the older, more prestigious clubs. In those cases, potential new members are identified and asked to join.
In order to join the very best, "old money" clubs, it seems one must either be a blood relative of an existing member, or achieve great personal success and notoriety. It's a meritocratic system, only it extends back for generations.
I haven't achieved great personal success; I'm still working on it. My dad was a member at Stanford Golf Club, because the university used to grant membership to employees who wished to join, a privilege they have since discontinued. So since my primary objective was to join clubs with great golf courses, my search was largely confined to new clubs actively soliciting membership. Actually, this suits me fine in both respects. I am a fan of modern course design, and socially I fit in better with the younger, less connected membership these newer clubs feature.
In fact, both sides of my family actively eschewed the privilege and prestige of high society. My mother's father was a great success story, a country boy from Washington state with a eighth grade education, who became a high ranking executive in New York City. Despite their great success, my grandparents always felt a little inferior to the well educated, well connected families they associated with, and never joined any of the prestigious clubs they would have been gladly accepted to. My parents met at Cornell University, and shortly thereafter moved west to California, partly to escape the more stratified east coast society (but mostly because of the weather and great opportunity for science minded men).
I played golf last weekend at one of my clubs, Kinloch Golf Club in Richmond, Virginia. Kinloch is an interesting study. It's a new club, but the local membership is already full. The local Richmond community has put their considerable financial might behind this young club, and it shows. Both newer and older members of Richmond's finest are represented. To me, this club exudes class. I'm grateful to have been accepted. It's a great place.
I played in a member-member with a gentleman who comes from a more privileged background, perhaps a second or third generation member of east coast society. He and I didn't click very well. I had a good time, but he thought I was quite bossy and controlling. While that may have been somewhat true, I felt there were deeper social differences. (Most GCAers I've met would agree I'm not a real bossy person.) At some level I am irreverent of the privileged society. I don't like it. Because of inheritance, I get to see it firsthand these days, but I always feel like an outsider, just like my parents and grandparents before me.
I guess I'm trying to make the point that somebody you may think is an asshole might be another man's best friend. It depends on your perspective. (I want to point out I modified this, because the original edit had a problem)
Now that I have completely reverted to my country roots, and am back living in the forests of the great Northwest, I wish to be immediately considered for Hillbilly Tour Card membership. Y'all can play with me at these great new courses.