My re-design for summer internship.

[Ryan Farrow]

I just wanted to get some feedback from my submission that was for Tom Doak’s internship program this summer. It was sadly unsuccessful but I would like to learn a few things from it.

First off here is a picture of the original hole from Chartiers CC. It plays 417 from the back tees. The picture is from the back tees.



Here is my entry; I tried a perspective sketch mainly due to seeing some of Mike Strantz's work. I admire his design process and how he uses his artistic talents to show off his work.



And here is a plan view sketch of a before and after:

[Jim Thompson]

Ryan,

I am no expert, however, developing and presenting a mastery of topo illustration would be a great asset in the business.  I doubt any design without it would even be considered these days.

JT

[Jordan Wall]

Ryan...

I like the elevated tees.  I think they would change the hole dramtically.

One question, what is that new addition to the left of the fairway??  Would that be a sandy scrub, or perhaps a water hazard??

In all I like it.  I also like the fact though, that the green is a little more of an angle and there is a greenside bunker.

Do you know what the green contours are like??

Looks good...

[Ryan Farrow]

On the left side of the fairway is a large waste bunker. There is a deep depression on the left side and I think the bunker would fit nicely into that natural area. As for the green contour it originally was a two tiered green with a pretty dramatic down slope in the middle. I would keep it similar only angle the slope better for shots on the left side of the fairway. If you are further away and on the right side of the fairway the down slope of the green would play at more of an angle.

[Ryan Farrow]

just trying to get this back on the first page. Posted it pretty late last night.

[Bruce Katona]

From my quick review it appears you are on the correct path to redesign.  Someone earlier mentioned adding a third dimension- existing and proposed contours would be helpful.  

In your perspective sketch, you certainly solved one design issue- the cart path was either moved or eliminated.

Think how much more powerful the submission would be if a perspective of the green complex was included.  

Good luck.

 Look for a construction job for the summer.  The experience is one you'll never forget.

[Marty Bonnar]

Ryan,
small points really, but important nonetheless.
Nice linework generally in your illustration, but:
1. Take a look at a book (or website) on perspective. There's some really simple rules that you'll soon pick up and can apply. (Yours is not quite there yet).
2. Be a wee bit more observant. Okay, there's a load of trees on the Hole. Many of them are coniferous (big, dark green pointy ones). You've only drawn deciduous-looking ones(round, curvy stumpy ones). Would be more realistic (and, much more importantly, demonstrate your observative powers) if they'd been more correct.
I agree with the other guys. More info on small scale design elements would be better. A good sketch and/or contour plan of the green complex would be very valuable!

Keep at it though!
FBD.

[Ryan Farrow]

Martin, I struggled big time getting the perspective to be where it is at now. I should have used the tree lines as a straight line and made a vanishing point out of that but when i started it was more like how the hell can I get a decent looking perspective without the use of buildings. But I will definitely look into that. I would like to use these kinds of sketch renderings to clients in the future. And as for a green contour it would be helpful but the submission was restricted to a one page maximum.

Thanks for the feedback.

[rocket]

Ryan.  I am sure the boyz at Rennaisance get plenty of applicants but there is always next year.    You should have your own identity.   What would separate you from the rest.
 Your drawing  is very basic.  There is no variance in line weight or shading.   Though I can't even draw a good stick man.  Is that all you see in the hole?  Look not from the outside of the house to the inside but look for the inside to the outside.  Just from the picture there is a nice pine in the middle that sticks out.  I would maybe open up the hole.  Cut or possible transplant some of the trees from the right side and move them to the left.

[rocket]

The hole would then play anything left would be jail.   But a nice drive right would reward you with your ball on the fairway.  
If I was to apply now for TD internship.  I would make a replica scale model of Lido beach golf club how it would look now with all the developement around.  
Or Go on his website  look at all his work.  You have one year to play all his golf courses and write a Confidential Guide on his golf courses. And make copies and sell it on GCA.  That should get you in.

[Tyler Kearns]

Ryan,

Skecthing landscapes is not very easy, and while your perspective looks a little askew, it does appear that you have some drawing ability. It does not need to be perfect, but it must be able to convey your ideas properly.

In regards to the plan view of the hole, practice will help you develop your own style. Be sure to observe the plans that are often posted on this website, or featured in the many GCA books. Certain things will appeal to you and some things will not, and a style will begin to emerge. Further, it will help you realize which standard features need to be incorporated into the plan.

Best of luck.

TK

[Ryan Farrow]

In defense of my plan view those were made in about 5 minutes to show the changes from the previous design. So i did not put much detail into those. Are the plan views in Shackelfords, "Grounds for Golf" a good guide?

[GDStudio]

Ryan,

Martin has some good points, along with the others.  One thing that helps me to get the perspective right is actually "cheating".  Draw your plan view, then scan it and use a photo editor (Photoshop) and play with the perspective you want to show.  This will help you learn the techniques in persp. drawings.

After you do this awhile, you will realize that you are getting the hang of it and eventually not need to do it this way.  Just one trick, there are plent of them out there.

[Ryan Farrow]

Branden, that is a very good tip with Photoshop. I was thinking about using my 3-d modeling program to get a perspective but I did not start on my design until I was back home for winter break and did not have access to my computer at school.

OT.... but I read the article on your site about your work in Slovakia.  What’s that experience like in Europe and just how good looking are those Slovakian girls?

[Brian Phillips]

Ryan,

Branden is married to a very good looking chick from Slovakia!!

Brian

[GDStudio]

Ryan...believe all the stories...

Brian...watch it buddy...

[Bruce Katona]

Ryan: If you Google many of the various golf course architects and designers who post on this and other sites, you can view their work on their websites.  Each has a very individual drawing and graphic presentation style.  You may want to incorporate a small sliver of each individuals style into one of your own until you develop your own presentation technique.